Sat: W took kids for 4 hours on Saturday and when she dropped them off, D6 wanted to stay with her mom, was crying and my stbx drove off. I guess she had a date or something. (thats got to weigh on stbx mind)
Sun: MIL found dead, heart attack, D9 was very close to her, haven't talked to D9 about it yet, W has been over at her parents house all day, I had the kids at a family reunion my side of the family. FIL just got back into town about 2 hours ago. W and her mom didn't get along, going to be rough on W becasue she didn't patch things up between them - now its too late (thats got to weigh on stbx mind)
Sun night: watching movie with the kids, someone on the movie was running away from something, D6 said "like mom ran away" and S5 said the same "yeah, just like mom ran away"
If its not one thing its another.
Remembered you all in my prayers today karen, Kat, Puppy, LWB, Starshyne, whatdidido, H4H, Cat, Germ and a few other including my W.
All I can do is:
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming
M45 W41 M10.75 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 W files for D 07/18/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
I'm sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. Sometimes events like this can have a way of making one reevaluate their priorities and their course in life; I hope so, in your wife's case.
Peace, and thanks for the prayers. I pray for all of you, too!
I am so sorry. If I remember correctly, you did get along. Maybe you can ask for a piece of jewelery that MIL wore for D9. I have the necklace and earrings of my grandma that were her favorites. They mean alot to me.
Hugs to you and your wonderful kids.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I am so sorry to hear about your horrible weekend. I know you will have a tough road ahead trying to deal with the kids' emotions. Thoughts and prayers are with you.
M:38 H:42 T:20 M:19 D:18 S:17 MLC: Sometime in 2007 OW Bomb 1: 12/28/07 OW Online relationship 2: Spring 2009 Told him I wanted D: May 10, 2009 D final: 07/09/11
Kat, I was close to my MIL, she was always on my side, she understood what W was doing and wasn't happy with her, W and MIL did not get along; it has always been a problem with my W, why her relationship with her mother wasn't better than it was. Now W will never be able to have the relationship with her mom she always wanted. (sad)
W's dad always did his own thing and could rely on his W to take care of stuff around the house while he was gone, she did everything for him, he would pack up and ride his motorcycle with his buddies, gone for weeks at a time, free spirit (see where W gets it from) and MIL would always be their for him, taking care of the house, the bills, his dog, etc.
I cannot see FIL even cooking a meal for himself
W called this morning wanted to take kids to school, I told her come over as soon as she wanted, I know she wants to be with the kids right now, she will be over tonight so we can talk to the kids about their grandma
God I do not understand why this had to happen, as if the kids don't have enough to worry about right now, They feel like their mother has abandoned them, now their Grandma, is gone.
I love them so much it hurts God, they are so little, why do they have to go though all of this I just want them to feel loved and wanted, I tell them everyday I want them, and I love them.
SOMEDAY NEVER COMES
Whenever I feel like I hit rock bottom I feel relieved thankful and pleased for I know there is only one way to go only one way to go from here its got to get better up, up, up, things are going to get better
them God throws me another curve ball another bump in the road its all getting very old will I ever get a break How much can I take I feel like someday someday things will get better but someday never comes. It just keeps raining someday never comes
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming
M45 W41 M10.75 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 W files for D 07/18/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
Jeff, I'm so sorry! Your MIL sounds like such a wonderful woman and a good friend too!!! You and your kids have had a rough year!!!
It always seems like that happens for me. I have had 2 awful years (1985) where everything bad happened (my 1st boyfriend dumped me and then my dad died and it was that kind of year) and then end of last year, I got the bomb and my bro's brain tumor the same week. But I do think we can always handle what God sends our way and things get better. I don't understand why bad stuff seems to come in packages; I guess God is still testing us and helping us become better people? I'd like to think there is a good reason!
Quote:
W's dad always did his own thing and could rely on his W to take care of stuff around the house while he was gone, she did everything for him, he would pack up and ride his motorcycle with his buddies, gone for weeks at a time, free spirit (see where W gets it from) and MIL would always be their for him, taking care of the house, the bills, his dog, etc.
I cannot see FIL even cooking a meal for himself
But I bet he might surprise you. I've done a lot of stuff this past year I never thought I could. I never used to do any what I considered guy stuff: simple repairs, mowing the grass, taking care of the kids in emergencies. Sometimes maybe it's good for us to grow like that, and get stronger and more capable, plus I think it makes us appreciate our loved ones more.
I think a lot of us are the same; our kids have one barely there parent and one stable parent trying their hardest like in your case. And I believe having one good parent is all a kid needs (my big bro and I were raised by a single widower dad and we turned out ok anyway). Maybe you even try harder when you're kind of a single parent, like you coast a little when you have 2 good parents, but when you almost have one like in our cases you try twice as hard to be the best parent you can be? I know my dad did that, too. (((((((Jeff))))))) Karen
Jeff, I am so sorry for your family to deal with this loss. I know it will be hard on your kids. Heck my Grandma isn't doing very well and it is hard on me! You are doing such a wonderful job raising those children. Keep up the great work.
It is sad that the kids saw that movie on tv of someone running and automatically thought of their mother. I wonder if she knows that they see her as running away? I wonder what she would think of that...
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
