The job stuff sounds like some great opportunities!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The interaction with BF sounds really good - friendly and supportive. His depression is bad, nothing will change right now. Don't let that get you down though.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Hey girls, and Purr! I like what you said, funny, get the information on the ground too! And thanks Mishka and Where - you are too kind !!! And hey K and Michelle, its comforting to know that you're "watching".
So, I was away all weekend with my BFF and 2 girls again. The eldest, 7 (who loved him) spent most of the weekend talking about him!!! We built a brilliant dam across a river and she kept going on about how he did that with them last year and how she wished she could see him...loads of times, it really made me sad! I tried calling him before I left Friday teatime, but no answer. Then he texted later saying sorry he missed my call and was with his best friend and would call me later - but he never did. Naturally, this, along with no text messages all weekend (unusual) made me a bit sad all weekend and felt resigned like my last post to trying to get the strength up (a la Kalni) to just say, enough.
So I get home and he had called me Friday! Very sweet, saying he was about to go out (big gang of them, 30th birthday) but to call him when I get chance for a proper chat and if I couldnt talk to him later, to call him tommorow... but of course I only just got the message so never contacted him all weekend! As soon as I hit a low, he always always does just enough to redeem himself and renew my faith. Grr!
I feel bad that I didnt call, but its not my fault and he still couldve tried texting me or something!
I left a message for him at home and tried his mobile - but no answer, so I have a feeling he is still away and will be working at HQ tommorow. I still dont know what his boss said Friday, what date he needs to move by (could be next month) or most imprortantly, how he feels about all of this. And I am so used to the daily contact since April, that when we have these weekends now when he doesnt contact me, I find it really wierd and unsettling. God knows whats going to happen next! I hope he emails tommorow and fills me in..
Oh and the web company said I was very impressive and that I was a strong developer and they definetly want to employ me sometime in the next 2-6 months! So I may finally have got a programming job in Cornwall - thats, as my deceased FIL used to say, rare as rocking horse sh*t. So I'm proud of myself.
Ali xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
HA!!!! Rare as rocking horse sh*t!!!!! That's hysterical! I'm going to have to steal that one.
Sounds like even though you had a "down" weekend it was still good since you were with BFF and her kids. I'm sorry she kept talking about him but her memories of him will fade in time. Who knows, maybe when he comes out of this depression and gets his head out of his arse she'll be able to make new memories with him just like you will.
(((((((((Ali)))))))))))
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
You know, I think as you get more and more of your life outside of him in order, the better you are going to be able to handle your life as it concerns him. Keep taking care of you. I think that will make your path clearer!
Hey Lisa! Well, he DID leave me a message Friday, but that was the last I heard from him, so I'm afraid I have been "spinning" a little today...I emailed him today, but no reply, so I figured he felt unwell, or down.. so I texted him at 5.30 to say I had emailed him but he hadnt replied, I hoped he was feeling ok after his weekend... no reply. So then (oh dear) I phoned him at 7. He answered and although he sounded very sweet when he picked up, all soft and sweet and pleased to hear from me..it became clear he didnt want to speak to me.
He said straight off, that he was tired and wiped out and flaked out and other such words and was going to have a really really early night...silence...so I said, oh, I guess you dont want to talk then...no Al, I just want to get a really early night as I'm so tired, but we'll catch up tommorow if thats ok... So I sounded hurt and awkward and didnt handle it well I'm afraid.
Instead I proceeded (oh dear) to ask him a bunch of questions, like how wsa the weekend - ohh, it was ok, alright (sounding fed up), but yes it was really nice to see him BMM (sounding sweet again). I asked him how the night out was Friday with their friend that was 30.. oh..it was ok, alrightish (sounding like it wasnt at all)..So clearly, he was not feeling too good.
Then he said he hadnt been to work today, becuase he couldnt be bothered he felt so wiped out and that he had driven back from Wales today instead of last night as he couldnt face the drive back and that (again) he was too tired to drive yesterday and he was knackered Friday after that meeting...I said I hadnt had a chance to talk to him about all of that..and again he said we'd catch up tommorow properly as he "couldnt concentrate" as he was so tired.
So that was it, he gave me the brush off, we were on the phone about 5 minutes and I feel embarressed about it. I havent seen much of him over hte past 2 weeks and my Mum reckons he is backing off again and is just not interested in me, that hes using me when he's at a loose end...same old negative messages, but then I cant see that he isnt behaving in the way she says. So naturally, not feeling too hopeful again.
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
Hey Al, you just described what I would have done 1 year ago with my H and have been doing with all the men in my life. Not giving them space to "cave" and take it personal. It has finally made sense to me that them being quiet, silent, distant from time to time has NOTHING to do with me.
Now, in your case, being in this "non-relationship", his "space" should be even more respected by you. Which means, you did push a bit harder than you should in my humble oppinion. But nothing tragic, don't worry too much. There are a lot of things going on in his head about work now, men CAN NOT handle "two things" at a time, and to them things are pretty simple "WORK' & "ALI"... Patience (you hate me, Iknow...) Love K
