Hey Matty....what it be?! Check out my new thread if you get a chance....it'll give you the 411 on what has happened since my last post. How's it going with you?
I decided to pay 50% of the old taxes.....just made him wait until Aug 1. If we actually went to court, those costs would be more than my half of the taxes. I did tell ex that his reaction to my trying to discuss the money made me feel he was severing our last bit of friendship. Others had told me you really can't remain friends and be divorced. That must be true.
P.S. While discussing the taxes ex sent me an email from his lawyer and by mistake he sent the part where he had asked, "I heard my ex has a new job. Will that get me out of paying maintenance?" I decided to pick my battle: pay the taxes now and be ready to fight if he tries to stop maintenance (it's barely anything anyway! It will just help me move after D17 graduates from high school....10 months from now).
What next will you have to face. they do take a different face all of a sudden or did we just not see it. I look at my H now and see a man I don't know at all. My divorce will be final in the next 2 weeks. He still has OW and living with her and taking her every where. His family is very supportive of me. I made this business deal with his brother and then he came back now I have to deal with H every day for a couple of months. He is Dr Jeryl and Mr. hyde. I'm sure he doesn't show the Ow the real side of his self. She is buttering up my oldest S24. He knows what she is and he doesn't tell me alot. My MIL told me to night the OW got my S a job for a business they needed a guy just like him to advertise their business so she iron all his clothes to wear. Granted he is 24 but she doesn't pay attention to her 4 kids that live with their dad how dare she try ot win over mine. It really hurts. I know he didn't tell me so it wouldn't hurt my feelings but it really does. That is one thing I was was a good mother. And I have good kids. I am just venting. You have so much on your mind I am sorry.
I haven't posted for a while. Mattie do take care of yourself. I am sorry for hijacking your post. I need to do my own again. I was just feeling so bad tonight and there is no one around. Thanks for letting me vent.
Good to talk to you to Mattie. I haven't had a thread for so long. I was trying to find YOYO too. Well as I posted my papers are in the courts. He is still living with OW. He is really changed someone that I don't even know. Now I have a business deal I had arranged while he was gone a job. He came back and he is going t run the job for the company so I have toput up with him everyday for about 90 days. That should be entertaining since we had a pretty big fight yesterday about OW helping my Sons.
I do enjoy the place I bought it is nice and peaceful and I can have my horses.
Hey Matty....just letting you know about the being D'd and friends thing....VERY true....and I am the one who tried to keep it civil....but nope....it had to do with money and a few other things.....I feel you can't be friends and D'd......maybe in the movies (and not even then sometimes!) but in real life?....I'm gonna say...VERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY hard.......it tooks two for that to work.....first time saying this...maybe in a long time...but that's IMHO!
Your story once again shows the sheer folly of divorce. You still have to deal with the old spouse, and is anyone really that much happier and "fulfilled"? I suspect not. It just leaves a trail of broken dreams and people, and the kids never really get over it 100% I believe.
There's a book called "The Good Divorce", what a piece of fiction!
FLTC, funny you mentioned "the Good Divorce"......I found it in a box of books labeled "free". Guess it didn't work for that person either. I actually picked it up, but haven't read it yet.
Ex called yesterday just to chat. He sounded friendly and sincere in asking how I was. He actually said, "I called because I hadn't talked to you in a long time". Guess he doesn't even realize the impact of the tax issue on my feelings! I often wonder if he really is "happier and fullfilled". I know he lives in a house that is spotless (D17 says it's like a museum. 80% of his stuff is still here at the house so I would think he would feel just as a visitor there.)
The good news, I guess, is that I could talk to him and not get sad! He still frustrates me when I ask if D17 can stay with him and he comes up with a million excuses. Some things never change.
