Still wondering how much damage I did with my words to H yesterday I meditated and the message I get is to keep going continue with DB but move on with my life either H will decide he wants to be with us or not nothing I can do I have done everything to make this work for 14 months and I need to let go waiting game peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
well H here acting normal like nothing even happened yesterday told the kids they are staying home here today playing games real games with kids not video games which is rare for him very rare he knows I love it when he interacts with kids maybe he is trying to act nice today? b/c of yesterday? or maybe he forgot all about it already? I asked him to set a boundry on gameboy with D12 He said he would limit it also out of character for him since bomb well Im not going to analyze it too much probably just a gap of humaness in his MLC I am going to go out as it is difficult for me to stay especially right now peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
maybe he is trying to act nice today? b/c of yesterday? or maybe he forgot all about it already? I asked him to set a boundry on gameboy with D12 He said he would limit it also out of character for him since bomb
I think he might be responding to what you talked about yesterday. Maybe tell him you appreciated the way he's been interacting with the kids? This would encourage him to do more of the same, in my opinion. -PH
I keep thinking of H and I confrontation on saturday I really said it all I dont know if he heard it at all baffling to me that H didnt distance himself when he came and was friendly and playful with kids but when I returned last night he was in a hurry to go
I spoke with a friend today who was a WAW many years ago she was probably late 20's when she left she said how she always wondered what would have happened if she faced herself instead of fleeing her first M she wound up M again to an addict, and her life became hell for many years and now she is D again
I just meditated and I feel my message is to keep going to leave H behind and move on with life I am here and I can trust that if I see any positive movement on H part I can stop and look if I see more of the same...I need to keep going no more energy can be placed in this as it will interfere with my life and poosbly gods plan for me I have to trust myself and go peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
peace- I am sure your h heard what you said...we just don't know if he will process it the way he should. I like what ph said. Let him know you appreciate the positives if you can.
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I just meditated and I feel my message is to keep going to leave H behind and move on with life I am here and I can trust that if I see any positive movement on H part I can stop and look if I see more of the same...I need to keep going no more energy can be placed in this as it will interfere with my life and poosbly gods plan for me I have to trust myself and go
You seem to have found your center again. The conversation you had with your H the other night must have been a great release for you. I think I need a release today...maybe I out to tell my H what I really think...maybe...
I am here and I can trust that if I see any positive movement on H part I can stop and look if I see more of the same...I need to keep going
From my experience, I have found that men can get discouraged easily if they try something new (and positive) and don't see a good response, they conclude that they failed and then they give up. I wish I knew this before the S. I didn't and my H gave up trying. If you can muster some energy, consider acknowledging his efforts. If not, he may give up prematurely and then you might very well see more of the same old him.
PH UD THanks for your support I will take your advice PH and keep acknoledging any good H does especially with the kids , as they told me, he followed through sticking with his boundry with the video time sunday
I called H this AM as I wanted to tell him of this large overdue bill that came to house He seemed short at first then seemed nicer- and said it was paid.,,and we hung up
then I called L..Just wanted information especially about custody issues.. filing/ fees ect and procedures..she talked to me ..I liked her I just want to be prepared..Im not filing yet I decided to wait till August that will be 18 months and If I see no shift in H I am thinking -I may file then
then I noticed H called while I was in store I decided to not call back so he called again..I picked it up he seemed normal..wanting to explain the bill to me further and then we wound up talking for about 30 minutes about business stuff The conversation was positive and friendly we connected we have never been able to talk this way as we do nowm and this past year He shares stuff about business b/c he knows I will validate his efforts and im never critical anymore
I told him my brother said the office was not in order as they are having trouble hiring a competent person I know he doesnt want my help b/c he doesnt want me to see what hes been doing this year as if I dont know? I just offered my help if he needed me to help with the bookkeeping and I could do it home He declined but seemed apprciative that I would care or want to help we hung up...
He seems as if he didnt hear me the other day.. everything is all friendly again I dont know what to make of it all I think he goes in denial peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
