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Joined: Feb 2008
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Hey Fish,

Excellent work! Your story has really been an inspiration and I hope that you and your W. continue to reconnect and build together. I am very happy for you both and wish you well on your journey. I will miss reading your posts!!

Cheers--TO FISH!!

Purr

Joined: Sep 2007
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Good for you Fish!

I hope you enjoy this time, and take in every moment.

I hope I can say the same for myself soon enough!!


JennyB
Me: 29
Him: 29
No kids
Married: Nov/05
Bomb: ILYBNILWY March/07
Back: May/07 "I love you, want to work things out."
2nd Bomb: August/07
I moved out: March/08
House sold, living apart
Waiting for papers...
Joined: Nov 2007
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This is great news Fish.

Just remember that the bombs will come, we have had many since we have decided to Bust our Divorce! But the difference is the willingness to work through our issues. In the past we would hold a grudge or just be plain angry. Now I see the two of us working as partners on all fronts. The best thing for us has been being able to have the safety of MC to speak our minds and the commitment from one another that we can not hold those thoughts against the other.

The goal now Fish, is to make sure that you are better together than before whatever that means for you. My opinion is that my marriage takes much more work now than in the past, but it is worth the effort and the results.

Stay in touch!


Me: 33 jacka** whom lied, stole, cheated, and basically treated DW like crap for years
DW: 29 kind soul who gave too much to me over the relationship

S7
S4

M: 7yrs
Bomb: 10/19
Seperated: 10/24

The worst reconciliation is better than the best divorce

Joined: Jan 2008
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I wanta be where you guys are. I need to buy a bucket load of Patience for i am running short.

Joined: Nov 2007
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BT -

Patience takes work, it is like everything in life worth achieving you have to work on it every moment. I can only tell you that it will come if you work on it.

You can get to this spot if you focus on growth and worry about BT...


Me: 33 jacka** whom lied, stole, cheated, and basically treated DW like crap for years
DW: 29 kind soul who gave too much to me over the relationship

S7
S4

M: 7yrs
Bomb: 10/19
Seperated: 10/24

The worst reconciliation is better than the best divorce

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 886
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I am trying Hound. She tee's off on me every opputunity she gets. I have worked on me really hard and will continue to do so but she has to meet me somewhere between. She just called to talk about an issue in the house (ants) and I asked her if she was mad at me for something and bc she has been very standoffish lately.

She flipped out. She is not well and very angry. Said she was moving forward with things, meaning S, for the four hundreth time. Why does she keep threatening and not doing anything?

Man this is hard.

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Me thinks that she is confused and scared to move on so the easiest thing to do is project and blame. You need to take it man, agree with her and affirm her concerns. Don't ask if she is mad, upset whatever at you it just makes things worse. Tell her your sorry about the ants or whatever and that you will do what you can to solve the problem... then go solve the problem.

Don't go looking for any return once you do, just do it. After a little while she will realize that she can trust you more and she will open up to you without anger.

Take it when she tee's off! And no she doesn't have to meet you anywhere! You are the one trying to save the marriage not her, so she can do what she wants when she wants how she wants and there is nothing you can do about it but bitch.

So, suck it up and know that the response is coming and plow through it.

I will post more on your thread...


Me: 33 jacka** whom lied, stole, cheated, and basically treated DW like crap for years
DW: 29 kind soul who gave too much to me over the relationship

S7
S4

M: 7yrs
Bomb: 10/19
Seperated: 10/24

The worst reconciliation is better than the best divorce

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 886
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Thanks Hound! I look forward to your comments on my thread.

Joined: Oct 2007
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Hey my thread was hijacked again!

What's up fellow DBers.

Just wanted to let you know that things are cool right now. I am heading home tonight for a long weekend. We have decided to take a few steps before moving back permanently. My bet is that W is going to tell me to stay on Monday. My new life makes her a bit nervous.

Hound - You are the king....

Team - GAL and space is the key to winning back your spouse. GAL makes you attractive and the space makes them want you back.

W and I had an amazing day/night in NYC on Monday. It was like a 24 hour honeymoon --- wow!

One of the awesome things about separation is the second honeymoon phase. It really is a high.

Joined: Oct 2007
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Fellow Dbers.. my divorce is officially busted. W has requested that I move back permanently.

Today was awesome... did some things around the house, had lunch with W, had sex, took a nap, played tennis, had dinner delivered, drank wine, had sex... Good night.

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