He says I always assume that people will do the right thing or the best thing or the thing that makes the most sense
could be you IRL.
IMHO (and I could be wrong) that's not the person you show on the BB where [people]=[women]. It seems to me that you always assume that women will do the wrong thing, the worst thing, and the thing that makes NO sense.
If I'm totally off base, I apologize, and I'll go get my eyes/head examined.
Corri told me that it seemed to her that I was "faking" here on the BB... I guess WYSIWYG doesn't necessarily apply.
I don't think so. I think one could be a Call Girl Genius.
Almost certainly true. Somebody famous once said that men always treat their mistresses better than their wives. I think that is probably valid even for single men. That's why I'd rather have a lover than a boyfriend. Why should I go to the seriously grievous trouble of trying to domesticate a wolf when all I have to do is pin a bunny tail to my monkey *ss (right where it would best accentuate my .7 waist to hip ratio) and give a little shake and I can get all the carrots and bananas I could possibly want?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
If you truly believe that, you had best leave all traces of your cow at home when you go on weekend trips and overhear conversations.
Okay, okay, okay... said I was going to be nice... A Call Girl Genius? Yeah. Yep. I have no doubt whatsoever, I could pull that one off. And there would never... narry be a cow in site. I'd forget how to cook, too; chicken soup is a thing of the past. You're sick and need of some puppy love? Go home to your wife... or hie yourself off to the doctor... come see me when you are WELL. I have diamonds to collect. Smile. Stroke of nails on the back... show of leather and lace...
People. People. Come on. Not ONE of you would be here if you were truly THAT. There is no way I'd be hanging my AZZ out here for all of you to see, if I wasn't hoping someone was going to NAIL MY AZZ to the wall over it. You nail my azz to the wall... there is some kind of caring in that. Somewhere. I can find my own way back, thank you.... just need to know... that there are real, smart, caring people in this world, who, if you SHOW them... are willing to give you a BOOST when you need it... they won't DO it for you... they won't look the other way... but they sure as he!! aren't willing to buy the schit you sell yourself in the mirror everyday.
Yeah. Call Girls. They sure are genius. Genius at... mirage.
There is nothing wrong with taking a side trip in life down that road... for a time. For anyone. Just don't get stuck there. Or do.
I... personally... can traverse very dark alleys. All by myself. In a genius kind of way.
I just choose not to. Cuz dark allies are dark places to be. And I can tell you... there are no cows, no bunnies... no MONKEYS... to be found. They are too smart.
Corri told me that it seemed to her that I was "faking" here on the BB... I guess WYSIWYG doesn't necessarily apply.
Lil, I also told you why I thought you were faking, and why that would make me sad... and you wrote a very eloquent reply to me. And I'm not so sure I was seeing your sadness... nor your 'faking,' but my own. For you certainly seemed confused to my original point... eh?
Sorry. I'm sorry. But people who care do not tolerate bad behavior. You don't teach them good behavior... cuz it isn't your job. But you don't tolerate bad behavior... becuz you don't tolerate it in yourself. Unless you do.
You're right!! So I'll stop it right here although the temptation is terrible!
I'm just really awful at getting across my opinion. It's somewhere in between what I think your opinion is (that Mrs. Brian was completely wrong and completely screwed up) and what I think you think my opinion is (that Mrs. Brian acting completely appropriately and did nothing "wrong").
Should you be able to count on him?
Yes I should be able to count on him (and I do). While I am not needy or demanding, when I need something from Raven, I ask.
This confuses me because I'm not sure if you're saying that Brian's wife made a mistake or not.
Yes she did. Whether she knew she was making a mistake or not is the question I have.
Brian said he text'd both his mom and his wife. Whatever he text'd was enough to cause his mom to jump on a plane and fly out.
My "assumption" is that Brian's mom knew his wife was with her mom and THAT was what precipitated the quick flight to Brian.
But I think Brian has every right to be upset and to expect better in the future.
I think he has a right to feel upset and expect different behavior from his wife. I also believe it would be more honest of him to have followed up with his wife with his condition as soon as he was able. I also think he should shake off the feeling that asking his wife to come home is somehow demeaning. Asking for what you want and need is not weak in my book.
Maybe I am just optimistic but I believe in being a team and partnership and if Raven and I don't give each other information, we put the other in the position of having to guess about things. We both have so much going on in our lives that we usually don't have time to try to guess what the other needs. What's "ironic" is that by being so open we are usually able to "guess" what to do for the other because we have LEARNED directly from the other what they want or need.
It's just my opinion and I completely understand that it takes a willing and able partner to manage it. And honestly we still don't manage it perfectly but each of us knows the other is doing their best.
But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads? ~Albert Camus
Is the still the puppy thread? I fell behind again.
Burg, I will just say this about that, no analogies: if my husband hadn't been willing to not only show me his puppy but lay it on its fuzzy little back, I don't think we ever would have gotten past our sexual issues. He (according to him) really needed an outside perspective on some his historical sh*t, and fortunately I was able to provide it. And it wasn't a case of "Oh, eureka, now I finally have the answer I have been seeking" -- he wasn't fully aware there even was a question at that point. He was just open to me with his vulnerabilities, past and present, and the discussions just sort of took on a life of their own.
Admittedly, I had a really good track record of *not* stomping his puppy, which is certainly a variable to factor in.
Be *able* to deal with something internally doesn't mean it's *optimum*.
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
(Lil) It seems to me that you always assume that women will do the wrong thing, the worst thing, and the thing that makes NO sense.
Good point. That's been my experience, though, with my female friends as well as romantic interests. My natural inclination is still to trust and assume the best but when I get a moment to think about it, as I do when I'm posting here, I realize that's not typically the way it works out. I'm learning to temper my initial enthusiasm with a little reality.
Stop WaitingFeel EverythingLove AchinglyGive ImpeccablyLet Go
Lil) It seems to me that you always assume that women will do the wrong thing, the worst thing, and the thing that makes NO sense. I would agree with this statement. I think it has something to do with that whole idea in Superior Man that women are like the Ocean, going in all directions and not going in any direction.
Sorry. I'm sorry. But people who care do not tolerate bad behavior. You don't teach them good behavior... cuz it isn't your job. But you don't tolerate bad behavior... becuz you don't tolerate it in yourself. Unless you do.
Sorry.
Huh?
My only point to Burg, and the reason I brought up the "faking" thing was that who we are IRL does not necessarily come across on the BB and vice versa. I said that Burg had a chip on his shoulder. He said that his boss saw him as someone who expected the best from people. I said he doesn't come across that way here, but then who does come across on this BB the same way they do IRL? At that point I mentioned your "faking" comment, meaning that YOU saw me one way on the BB and that was different from the way I saw myself.
This is not to quarrel with the content of your "faking" comment, just using it to illustrate the different ways we come across here. K?
