Blindsided

[RealityTrip]

Great job! You are doing really well. It's very hard to keep the expectations at bay. Even when we know not to have them... mine creep up on me from time to time! Sounds like last night was really nice for both of you.

Have a great lunch!!! GAL-Tastic!

[Mimi00]

Glad you two had a good night; that's wonderful to hear.
Keep making progress & thinking positive

[chl0901]

Thanks, RT & Mimi! Last night was okay, too. Nothing special, but light conversation while watching a movie and a couple of laughs. I'll take it.

[chl0901]

I came into work a little early today so I could take a long lunch break to see my friend and her new baby. I told H last night I was leaving early, so he offered to take S to daycare this AM. After I got to work this AM, H text me asking why I had to come in early so I told him. He then text me again at lunch asking when I was going back to work (I don't know why). I didn't see that message, so he text me again and said, "hello?" I got the feeling he was trying to "check up on me" or something. I know a lot of times that cheating spouses will question/accuse the other spouse of lying, etc. but it is really annoying!

[RealityTrip]

My cheater went through the phase of snooping on me and outright asking if I was seeing this person or that one... etc. All of that. I think she was kind of hoping I would cheat to alleviate her own guilt for her actions. Nope. Not gonna do it! Look at the mess it caused for her! LOL!!!

[MileHigh]

Ditto on the snooping. Desperately looking for justification.

[lost_hope]

Yeah that is really annoying. My dad used to do that to my mom, who doesn't have a cheating bone in her body. Three guesses why he was so paranoid ... Sorry you're going through this chl0901. Just ignore him though I know it would be hard not to call him out as crazy!!

[chl0901]

Yes, definitely hard not to turn it around on him, when he is the sneaky one! Last night, when we were in bed, he asked me why I was wearing shorts because I never wear shorts to bed. I just felt like wearing shorts (they were PJ shorts)! Geez - plus, these shorts didn't even fit me a couple of months ago so I couldn't wear them!

I backslid a little bit last night and tried to cuddle/initiate. I knew better but thought he would want to. Whoops! He did not move a muscle when I snuggled up to him and then told me I was tickling him so I moved away. He then said something about he turned over so we could ML and I didn't do anything (I was already facing away from him now since he had not moved when I tried to initiate), and so I tried to move back over there and he told me I had p*ssed him off and to leave him alone. I was sooo annoyed.

This AM, H text me the following:

"Sorry about last night. I've been really happy with where we've been lately and I appreciate you making an effort, just got mad when I did turn over and you did nothing."

I do appreciate that he did apologize about last night and acknowledged that I have been working(hard!)on myself and our relationship.

[Lll54]

I'd be pretty stinkin' happy about a text like that!!! Hope your spirits are up!!

[RealityTrip]

Stay focused on YOU and as calm as you can be. It's a real rollercoaster with our spouse's emotions!