That sick feeling... We both have that! The thought if this dragging on that long is INSANE. Me myself... I can't see saying her name again at that point after what I've been through regardless of their "state of mind". Hopefully she be forgiving of my state of mind at that point which will probably be "GFY".
By then shell have destroyed my kids finacial future, any chance at cool trips they should gave had, squashed my love & respect into oblivion, my family and friends despise her actions... I don't know man and you know what, no one else does either. This is the best place I've found though... YOU ARE IN EXACTLY THE RIGHT PLACE if you wanna take a last stand!
I agree with you so much Blessed. You actually made me laugh because it's also insane to me how many GUYS on here that I've met that are going through very similar sitch's!!
I don't know what my breaking point is...but I was speaking with my MIL tonight after my W left for work and I said that I don't want to lose her or her family - she said I wouldn't that she'll always love me and she confused by what her D is doing?
I also agree that this place has been a life saver for me, and if someone my M is saved it will be because of the help and strength I received.
I was thinking about the financial aspect, and I'll do whatever I have to do to provide the best I can for my kids, but I'd be lieing if I didn't say that I;d deeply miss the family vacations (that's one thing my W said has always been great).
Oh I just remembered, my MIL seem to mention that my W was alluding to the fact that I had cheated on her! I have NEVER cheated - EVER! I told my MIL that I would wager my D's lives on it...I think my W is trying to make herself believe things that somehow make her position stronger?!?
Anyways take care, and I will continue to read along and hope for the best for YOU!
Me - 34 W - 33 M - 8 years T - 15 years D7, D5, D2 Bomb Nov 10/2010 "I'm not happy and INILWY" W Staying for the kids Mar 13/2011
Count me in guys! There are so many people in this very similar situation. I am wondering if there is an uptick of the WAW syndrome around the holidays?? Why couldn't they wait until spring?
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
SIC - A few days before my wife left, she snooped into my email account (have no idea how) and found an email from 5 years ago (2 years into our dating, but 3 yrs prior to our marriage). The email was from an old gf and was fairly suggestive. Anyway, I had forgotten that the email even existed let alone still saved in my email account. She immediately accused me of cheating on her 5 years ago. Said that this confirmed her decision to leave. And said that she was p*ssed that i was accusing her of an EA with a guy who she says is just a friend when I was the one that cheated!! She is totally using this email to justify her actions!
BTW - I did not cheat on my wife... at any point. So frustrating.
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
You too! Just remember many things will be done and said to justify her decision. The kids will be fine! You'll be fine. You need to move on. You should find someone better, you deserve that. I'm not in love with you, I don't think I ever really was. Your not attractive to me anymore. I feel trapped. I just wanna be free. THERE IS NO ONE ELSE! My favorite... We will still be friends! Listen hang tough... YOU decide when your done. Either way (and this is still a daily challenge for me) Focus on you and move on like your marriage is over... It may be. Protect yourself and prepare yourself while she's not focused on waging war on you yet... DON'T GET CAUGHT! I've learned with my W, patience pays as far as these little battle with the attorneys go... She is anxious to get this over so usually gives in in the interest of time and money. My W... BIG on getting money now... Obviously she's entitled to her share, but she want's more than what's fair even. So be aware and be careful. It is possible she will keep her word too, but tread lightly. Good Luck! Let God handle what you cannot control and figure out quickly most of this you can't!
...The kids will be fine! You'll be fine. You need to move on. You should find someone better, you deserve that. I'm not in love with you, I don't think I ever really was. Your not attractive to me anymore. I feel trapped. I just wanna be free. THERE IS NO ONE ELSE! My favorite... We will still be friends!
Hilarious! I just finished getting my girls to bed and thought I'd check in again before going to bed. My W has literally said all of this except she's never said "your not attractive to me anymore". She's also said a few times "I never really feel like I got a chance to make a choice because we started dating so young" WTF??!? Anyways, thanks again!
Me - 34 W - 33 M - 8 years T - 15 years D7, D5, D2 Bomb Nov 10/2010 "I'm not happy and INILWY" W Staying for the kids Mar 13/2011
You too! Just remember many things will be done and said to justify her decision. The kids will be fine! You'll be fine. You need to move on. You should find someone better, you deserve that. I'm not in love with you, I don't think I ever really was. Your not attractive to me anymore. I feel trapped. I just wanna be free. THERE IS NO ONE ELSE! My favorite... We will still be friends!
LMFAO-I have heard these exact things so many times! Everything, word for word. I also got I just settled with you, you are happier now, you never loved me, I don't care about you that way anymore, and we haven't been getting along for a long time.
Too funny!
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
I was thinking...is there a handbook or a website that they use? Seriously, I have never thought much about it, but these are word for word....then denying there is someone else.
I was talking to my wife once after I dropped the kids off, and her text messages were going crazy...she just ignored them. She said they were from her brother I told her to answer them then, and she said she didn't want to be rude. (she never actually checked who they were from)
Now mind you, in a more innocent time, she would answer her family fast no matter what....so she thinks I'm stupid also.
We need a thread with a WAS checklist, see how many things match what we all heard....a little humor during a tough holiday season.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
Now I'm really F F F PISSED! My W introduced her new OM, who I know she has not known very long to my babies. I could literally crush steal right now. My son ssid they were playing and wrestling and everything... Ffifjhxjc!!
