What's da haps, man?

[TimeHeals]

TH, in theory yes you could enjoy the process and make light of it. In few cases it works but when one person stands to lose so much it's not an easy feat

Yeah, a lot of things in life aren't easy.

A river could overflow or a tornado could happen by, and your whole house could be swept away. You can lose a lot of things and worse... you can lose people in your life.

And... whether or not you accept things as they are and just deal with them and remember all that you have to be grateful for or not... the outcome may not change.

So... if the outcome will not change (as is often the case), will you look back and wonder why you fussed so much?

[soleil]

So... will you look back and wonder why you fussed so much?

I don't consider this "fussing." I consider it actually pretty normal to find it annoying to comply w/ everything the other party asks for, when the decision is theirs, yet they don't comply w/ anything you've requested. I think someone who could laugh and drink champagne at the situation might have a few screws loose, honestly.

I hear what you are saying...to just go with the flow...but to act as if it's something fun/happy or something to be enjoyed is not the truth of the matter.

[TimeHeals]

It's OK to stand up for yourself, it's OK not to give up any ground you need not give up, and so on.

The 'fussing' part is just you wishing you didn't have to deal with it though. That's what I mean.

Yeah, sometimes ... it doesn't come naturally. Sometimes, however, it does if you don't fight that it is happening

[soleil]

The 'fussing' part is just you wishing you didn't have to deal with it though. That's what I mean.

Ah, I hear ya. Makes total sense. Yep, just gotta face it head on and kick it in the face when it gets tough. LOL. Kidding. No but seriously, I hear you loud and clear

[v1olin]

Yep, just gotta face it head on and kick it in the face when it gets tough. LOL. Kidding.

This is what I do, but sometimes I can't kick high enough to reach the face!

[KellBell0820]

He is D'ing me. You'd think he'd want this to be over w/ and soon......

You know, I think I say this everyday! I'm sorry he's being so difficult and making things so hard. Doesn't it make you just want go postal?

[ImprovedRomeo]

Sol, hope you had a great weekend

Goodluck tomorrow and stay strong!

[soleil]

^ Thanks, IR. I really appreciate that.

I DID go to court today finally! There was some back and forth w/ our Ls and his L kept saying how I should just sign the house over how it's ridiculous that I haven't. My L was advising it was in my best interest since the house has a negative equity, etc but I did not budge. As you know, we were there was H filed a motion to get me to pay half the mortage. Turns out he is only currently paying 1/3 of the mortgage since his relative pays the2/3s of it! That is somethig I didn't know. So anyway, we go into court and the judge ruled that I do not have to pay the mortgage and taht I am not allowed to remove anything else from the house and that I am allowed at the home, just not in the part being rented out "sine the home is half hers anyway." He also said he imagined we had bigger things to worry about this. Very true.
So... as for the final hearing... not happening til March! That seems so long now. H was very quiet and I did not look at his face even once, no Hellos, nothing. It was a change from the last time when I greeted him happily. Today I just couldn't... It's weird to think where we started and where we are now. I loved him w/ every fiber of my being. I am afraid I will never love anyone like that again and I wonder if I ever will. It's like a huge scar on my heart. I never responded to his petition for the D by bed and board (basically a lega sep) so I need to do that. My L was awesome today, too, btw.

So that is where I am at now.

I had a lovely weekend and got a lot of homework/labs done and hung out with HG again. HG and I kissed a lil more. I am conflicted/nervous. For instance, I feel happy & really enjoy the time we are spending together and at the same time, I am scared? He said he "really" likes me and I like him, too. We've been out 8 times now & he said he's not seeing anyone else right now. We went for a walk downtown yesterday which was nice.

So that is where I'm at now.

[soleil]

Oh, btw, the judge asked if I had been "sneaking in the home at night or damaging the property?" LOL. I have been back mabye 3x since I moved out last Sept. The funny thing about him saying I am not allowed to remove anything else is I pretty much got everything I wanted out of the house and for the sheer fact I haven't been back really but I am allowed to come and go as I please since it's half mine (I don't plan on going back).

[ImprovedRomeo]

So glad to hear it Sol! Good job and I hope you made sure you looked super hot when you walked into the court room

And thank God your L shaped up a bit today. Well at least you now have till March to enjoy yourself and hopefully that day will pass too and you'll keep moving forward.

Good to hear about your wekend and HG too. If he really likes you he'll respect your feelings and go slow as long as he knows you're not brushing him off. Just be careful...it hurts to get hurt again lol but then you can't be little miss apprehensive forever either (Kelly Clarkson's Miss Indendendant).