Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
#2089279 10/14/10 03:05 PM
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 386
N
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 386
As part of my ceaseless preparatory work for my return to the states I want to get some ideas about how to deal with workplace affairs.

Here is the sitch. W is having an A with her former boss. They now report to the same manager. I must quit my job to return to the states and begin anew. She will support me financially through this regardless of how we go forward. I want to reconcile and I think there is a reasonable chance this will happen.

Rule #1 of affair busting seems to be end all contact. In my sitch this can’t happen in the short term. We can’t afford it. Once I get a job, she can try to find a new one, but until then I’m looking for ideas as to how to nip the affair in the bud?

We’ve talked about going to HR or their common boss to separate them as much as possible, but I don’t think our R is strong enough yet to take that risk. W will likely agree to full disclosure. Email password, cell phone records, texts etc. She gets it.

Anyone with experience in this?


M:37
W:34
M:4 years
T:6 years
No Kids
A disclosed - 9/1/2010
W asks for separation - 10/19/2010
Moving on - 10/24/2010
A ends (and I believe her) - 12/2010
Content - 3/1/2011
Served - 3/18/2011
D Day - 6/20/2011
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 11,646
J
Moderator
Offline
Moderator
J
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 11,646
Wow 50 views and no comments.

Quote:

but until then I’m looking for ideas as to how to nip the affair in the bud?


Nip it in the bud? This isn't like house training a puppy.

They both started it and they have to end it.

What your wife and you talked about are good ideas, and not much you can or should do.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet


Moderated by  Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard