Well, last night - or I should say early this morning - we were woken up by way of our house alarm and smoke detectors going off. We had a bazaar fire in the living room and the whole house was filled with smoke! The bedrooms were the last to get blasted with it since our doors were all closed. (Everyone's fine btw!) By the time we were up, the fire was out. How, you ask? According to what we can figure, there was some sort of shortage in the power strip for our 120 gallon fish tank. It caught the cabinet on fire, followed by the leather loveseat nearby. The heat from the flames then caused the glass to burst , spilling all the water - and fish - out, which put out the fire! Our living room, entry way, and part of the dining room is one huge mess. Dead fish were everywhere as well as soot and gravel and everything else in the tank. You can't make this stuff up! Our house smells terrible....burnt leather, plastic, and other crud...
Want to know the REALLY weird part to all of this? I'm concerned that this crisis will get into H's head and make him all negative again when things were going well, all things considered. I know: crazy thing to worry about at such a time. However, if he was feeling pressure of responsibility and financial burden before, I can only imagine how he will feel now!
The flip side could be that this crisis brings you closer. It could give him the chance to be thankful tat everyone is alive and ok. Concentrate on this aspect, not the money.
H32 Me32 together:10 M:5 No kids ILYBINILWY 7/28/10 OW found 8/15 A exposed 8/31 I Move 9/3 Dark 10/1
I'm very grateful to hear you're all ok, but I can totally understand why your thoughts would immediately go to how this will affect any progress you've been able to make (or not). I think the stuff we're all going through is so omnipresent in our lives that EVERY major event, good or bad, is something we worry about triggering a bad or good response from the spouse. In many cases our worry is probably over nothing and the event doesn't make a difference. Let's hope if it does, it's a positive difference, but I agree with LanceSijan above that there is a reason for everything. (((HUGS)))
M45 Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11 Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy "Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying
Thanks, everyone - for the well wishes and thoughts! It means a lot to have support from my little family here.
We've called the insurance company and had a restoration specialist out yesterday. $6-8,000 just for clean up! It's amazing to me how there is ash present ALL over the house even though the fire was contained within the living room area. Crazy. Made me realize just how terrible 9/11 really was with just a teeny glimpse of what happens. (and I do mean TEENY glimpse.)
We have to wait for an insurance adjuster to come out tomorrow or Tues. to see how much of what the insurance co. will pay - and figure in our deductible.
Allen, I'm glad you mentioned thanking H. I did do that yesterday, actually. Thanked him for handling things and remaining calm and in control.
I do feel bad about the fish! It's weird because you don't really see them as "pets" a lot of times, but we had some pretty big ones that have been with us a long time! Plus, we'd just had some babies. H said those dang fish sacrificed their lives to save us from further damage.
You're all right: everything happens for a reason and that things could have been much, much worse! I am grateful even though pretty inconvenienced right now.
As for the R issue - it is natural to think of that first since that's what is so prominant at this time. However, keeping expectations low IS key. Hopefully it will bring us closer or not be a setback. Today seems just more of the same as of late. It would really be nice during such a crisis to feel that partnership again, to have someone to lean on, but I'm taking it as a chance to further realize that maybe someone's trying to teach me that I don't need to lean on another person. Too much of my life has been spent leaning on a boyfriend or spouse and not developing friendships or handling things myself and leaving the rest up to God. I'm learning more and more through this process that it is my biggest Achilles heel and until I work through that, I haven't done the "work" on myself that's necessary in all of this.
