Is it possible that my waw will "come to her senses" once she realizes what she's set into motion with her divorce filing and filing for support? That is, will she realize that she might have made a mistake once things go legal and hit the court system. Or, mostly do things just get worse and worse once it hits that stage. Specifically, I think my waw believes that I will be marginalized in the custody of my 7 month-old son and will simply be there as a "day care provider" (to give her a chance to workout, run, yoga, whatever) rather than as a parent with much more time. If it turns out that I get a major role, I wonder if that might be a wake up call? Obviously, I just want as much time with my son as I can get--he's so young and so much fun--and not to do anything for purposes of a wake up call.
Does anyone have any experience with this on either side?
Detach,detach,detach. I am in the middle of it. You will never see the sitch for what it is without detaching. Let go. Let go for yourself. You are in control of you and only you. You can not control or even think about if your W will wake up. Cherish your time with your S and create your mind for a life with or without your W. I have been served papers and have built my mind for a life with or without W. You need to do the same.
This was the very same question I asked in my thread. My wife has recently filed for a final court date to try to end it sooner than later. She is feeling the heat but so far no real signs of "coming to her senses." I hope your wife is not as stuborn as mine.
Me 35 Wife 34 Two daughters 8 years and 3 years Bomb 3/30/09 W filed 4/16/09 We met in'92 married in 2000 Divorce final
v1olin is your wife having an A? You need to find out and put a stop to it pronto. Any signs? I never saw it when my W was around. Now obvious. My W is pushing hard and fast for a D too. Don't mean to be harsh. Just reading between the lines. The way I see it, I'm not in your sitch and completely detached. Just something you need to think about and look into.
In my sich, no affair for w. Just felt that after having a baby she was a different person and I wasn't the right guy for her anymore. Some post-partum/hormonal effects, but this is now beyond that and reason.
I just feel so sad that it has come down to courts, attorneys, etc, when 8 months ago we were the best buddies in the land. It just makes me nauseated...I try hard not to dwell on this and just move on...but it is so damn hard!
My wife is not in a PA but she is way too attached to a "friend" who is also married and has two children. Tonight I found in a journal of hers that she was thanking god for the time that she spends with this guy and that he has shown her how a man should treat a woman and a man should be compassionate,caring, and confident. WTF?? and the people on here have not said one thing about this being a problem. Even my DB coach said to not worry about it? As if I am not those things? I have been working my ass off to save this marriage/family and this is what I get?
Me 35 Wife 34 Two daughters 8 years and 3 years Bomb 3/30/09 W filed 4/16/09 We met in'92 married in 2000 Divorce final
v1iolin, I read your story. Sounds very close to mine. My wife is, I think, probably more stubborn in the sense that once she makes up her mind, she will not change it. Her parents support her too and have taken over many of my domestic duties so the transition after booting me out has been completely smooth for her.
I love her dearly still and hate that we have ended up with legal things. I had to do it to protect myself and did not want to end up a doormat and give in to her just to be nice and believe that she might come around. Mostly giving in means that they ask for more and more and more...and then they still leave you and you're screwed with terrible monthly payments for the next umpteen years.
My wifes family fully supports her too. Her mother and her husband are also therapists so they think that "kids are resilient" and all that BS! It makes me sick to see cards from her mother and family treating her like she is the victim in all this.
Me 35 Wife 34 Two daughters 8 years and 3 years Bomb 3/30/09 W filed 4/16/09 We met in'92 married in 2000 Divorce final
