So who is controlling your emotions? You got a choice.
Quote:
So we get in car to leave and W starts planning "our" next trip to Disney in Oct.
So be all over this. How much you enjoyed the trip. Talk about her parents, the fireworks, everybodies fav ride, event, meal. Great road trip idea: make up the GIMA family fight song.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Just switched off so W could drive. All happy now. MIL gave me a hug this am before we left.
On a positive note, my in-laws last night remarked on my wt loss and said they could tell just from looking at my face (funny, other people have said the same). Thanks.
Have been carrying on conversation with W and kids.
Did do a little leading as W was making reservations for our next Disney trip. She was trying to book a two bedroom, which would cost us more points than a 1BR. So, I said we don't need 2 BR's. Unless nothing smaller is available, just get a 1BR. I expected push back but did not get it. She changed the reservation to a 1BR. God knows what our sitch will be then but I'm not concerned with that.
Oh, and one more thing. I did a 180 for me - bought some gasoline for a lady who was stranded without fuel and was trying tto get home. Don't know if W saw and don't care. Made me feel better.
That does feel good when you do something like that GIMA, doesn't it? I have to remember that myself at times, last time I bought drinks for the night for a service member, and left. Felt really good.
Helps the PMA, sounds like you have some of yours back today. A good thing!
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
We all made it home safe and sound. Thanks to everyone for your support last night and this morning. I really needed it.
Had a good dinner, now hanging out with the family in the den. Kids playing a game and joking, while W and I are updating our calendars with kids' school schedules and dates - they start on Monday.
Things are very pleasant right now. W and I are pretty worn out from the trip to Disney and the driving. But, despite our fatigue, we are talking really nicely to each other. She doesn't know it, but she looks really beautiful right now. She's not "done up" and her hair is falling around her face. Just gorgeous. God, I need patience and strength.
What an up and down day. This am, I feel like everyone (in-laws and W) is pulling back from me. Then, within 10 minutes of getting in the car to leave in-laws for the drive home, W is talking nicely to me and making plans for "our" next trip to Disney when the kids have a break from school in October. This is the same woman who said on the night she dropped the bomb that she would wait to see my changes, but would not wait "6 months." Don't believe anything they say and only half of what they do.
Well, I am physically and emotionally wrung out. But, I fell surprisingly ok.
One day, I would really like to know what is going on in her head. She may not know. I sure don't. And, I am not trying to figure it out - not in my job description.
you are doing well gima ..real nice to see ...and her "reversal" on the 6 months comment is is a full force affirmation of that fact. keep pedalling ..steady as she goes.
It's crazy b/c the 6 month comment has stuck in my head. I haven't marked time, but today, I realized the Oct. trip would be close to that 6 month mark. So, in a way, if we can make it through that 6 month mark, then maybe...
Keep going GIMA. Sounds like you are doing well. All positive things I see from what I am reading. Keep going with the don't give a dang attitude, it will keep you in check. I can say at this point, that I personally never fully detached from the sitch. My biggest mistake. Keep going!
Gima, I took a few days off and just caught up with your Disneycoaster ride. You continue to to do the "sure 'n steady". And I know it's never the "sure 'n steady 'n easy. I empathize with the feelings of "everyone backing away". I'm feeling the same from my stepson and stepdaughter. But I tell myself I'm more than likely wrong. If anything, they're backing away from the whole sitch and the pain and confusion that pervades the whole family.
Originally Posted By: givingitmyall
One day, I would really like to know what is going on in her head. She may not know. I sure don't. And, I am not trying to figure it out - not in my job description.
Amen, my brother. Amen.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac
