Long Walk Home on the Lake Erie Shore

[smartcookie]

So, SC...if my wife sees the changes and says that they don't matter, how do I know that is not apathy. Just because she is watching the changes, does not mean she actually cares about them, correct?

You can't believe everything she says right now. Her perception is being influenced by her emotions.

She may be subconsciously testing you. Just keep the course. Ask yourself daily, what's my long term goal... does this action get me closer or further from that goal ?

Hang in there, I know it sucks royally. I know some days you think it's not worth it anymore. I know some days you just want the pain to go away. I know you just want to move forward.

Tell me why she's still in the same house as you ?

Hugs

[upside_downer]

No drama, Neil. Stick a fork in me. I'm done.

[TwinDad]

Neil,

I hope things continue to go smoothly. Keep up the PMA....it might be infectious!

[ndsmhelp]

So, SC...if my wife sees the changes and says that they don't matter, how do I know that is not apathy. Just because she is watching the changes, does not mean she actually cares about them, correct?

You can't believe everything she says right now. Her perception is being influenced by her emotions.

She may be subconsciously testing you. Just keep the course. Ask yourself daily, what's my long term goal... does this action get me closer or further from that goal ?

Hang in there, I know it sucks royally. I know some days you think it's not worth it anymore. I know some days you just want the pain to go away. I know you just want to move forward.

Tell me why she's still in the same house as you ?

Hugs

Was that a rhetorical question, or did you want the logistical reasons as to why we are still there?

I don't want to hijack Neil's thread.

We are still together because we agreed to be until house / home / finances were in order, at which time I would leave.

Emotionally why?....she said she doesn't want to see me out on the street, or struggling to survive.

Sorry Neil.

NDS

[Neilh23]

we'll see how smooth they keep going.

Ndsmhelp...it's ok. sorry you're having a rough go of it.

so i got reciprocation today... .... picked the girls up from W's house, and they had a big picture that they colored for me....makes me feel a little better....

[pisces9]

thats so great- means it was a family idea :0)

so sweet! how are you doin Neilio?

[Neilh23]

so sweet! how are you doin Neilio?

tired more than anything....really, very tired. not entirely sure why.... other than that good. just going along, doing my thing....how's pisces? seems as if you are doing really well. cutting ties with yoru fam is hard tho...

[pisces9]

sorry you are tired Neil- its your body telling to to relax and take an emotional break from all this....i know the feeling.

im good- just processing a lot. i think it will be a healthy break and create a better relationship w my family.

it will be a long process- maybe 6 mo to a year until im done with my job here completely.

sounds like you are staying active which is great. does school start again soon for you?

[Neilh23]

two weeks from today is when the kids come back. i've been sorta busy....i'm taking a mental break from here...i'm tired of thinking about my sitch... thanks for checking up on me. i do come and read everyone's sitch...i just don't have a lot to say...LOL>..other than what everyone else is saying to them

[Coach]

tired more than anything....really, very tired. not entirely sure why

Stress. Emotional, physical, mental and spiritual stress. Take care of all of you. My MC told me the second time we met after my W walked out that I would have to be the one to fix this. The MC told me my W had checked out emotionally and that I would have to prepared to done anything to make the M survive. She told me that meant unconditional love and support. Well all us DBers jump into this full bore and there is no way we a prepared for the toll it takes on us. That's why we are hungry for some love (energy) back. It's hard work. You are not alone Neil.