I am sorry. Some people never learn and dont appreciate the chances they get. And they miss them. I guess your H missed his last(?) chance to show his better self.
I know you will be fine, you are already. Maybe it is time for a trip to my side of the world... Love K
Maybe it is time for a trip to my side of the world...
Funny, I've been thinking that it would be good for you to spend some time over here with me. I think I mentioned a couple of people I met here stayed with me & it was a good time all around.
My mother fell off a ladder yesterday & broke/crushed her foot. Good thing I live close, as she won't be able to walk for about 8 weeks.
When I commented on "what was she thinking", the Ortho Doctor said he fell off his roof last year & was out of commission for a month. No one thinks they're going to be the one that falls, that's why his business is so good.
As far as my H goes, I'm still in a place where I don't want any interaction if I can help it. It would be much better if I could get back to calm & cool, because right now I'm having trouble containing myself, much more than in the last 2 years. Saying things like, "Stay out of my house.....I don't give a BlowF if you have to change your plans to take care of S5", etc.
Instead of reacting like he did before, he's actually been side-stepping the blows....No mention of D or a price I'm going to pay. Maybe because he knows I've come to the end now.
Anyway, just got an e-mail telling me he'd be happy to trade Friday for Saturday if it makes it easier for me.
Funny, I've been thinking that it would be good for you to spend some time over here with me. I think I mentioned a couple of people I met here stayed with me & it was a good time all around.
LOL, maybe I will... I am getting my finances straight and then... I will start travelling again.
I am sorry about your mom... 8 weeks for her to mend the bone and 8 weeks for me to see if I can mend my M (sorry, the connection was automatic).
You are angry again. They say anger is fear. What are you afraid of, do you know? xxx K
I may have forgotten, but didn't you start posting in April---oh, nearly two years ago? It amazes me that you have worked so hard and held on for so long; I hadn't expected to find your marriage still alive, in its own, torturous way. I would never have thought, going into this, how long a painful situation could sustain itself, with signs of light, followed by defeat, followed by light...
Wow Delia, I was thinking about you the other day, wondering how things were going in your world! Please do update us when you have the time.
Yes, I would say that it's amazing to me too, how long the situation can sustain itself.
We did have a breakthrough of sorts, I've been served (kinda, actually he just handed me the papers, I signed & handed them back.) I included this letter in the envelope; (Thanks Puppy!)
H,
I'm extremely saddened and disappointed that our marriage has come to this, but in view of the current circumstances I must move on with my life. The last year & a half has drained away much of my love for you, and the latest step has all but snuffed out what was left.
As you know it was NOT my desire to divorce, but I can now exit our marriage with a clean conscience, knowing that I gave it everything I had to try and save it. While you may not have agreed with the way I handled some of my efforts, I did, nevertheless, give great effort, and I hope you will realize one day that everything I did, I did to try and save our marriage, protect the children, and keep our family intact.
I have no regrets.
And I will continue to fight for what I believe is in their best interests, as well as to protect myself.
I must now move on. As much as I WANTED to be married to you, I realize now that I no longer NEED to be, knowing how you feel about me and knowing the things that you've chosen to do. I do pray that you'll find whatever it is you're looking for, and that you'll do it in a safe and healthy way and somehow allow God to be in the middle of it. I do very much still care for you, and genuinely want you to be happy.
Sunny
That was on the 19th of this month & since then I haven't really spoken with him except to confirm times regarding the kids, etc.
He doesn't look very happy, but who's to know. I've been doing whatever I have to do to keep positive & busy, which is no problem with taking care of my mother until she can walk, having the kids 90% of the time & now getting all the legal stuff in order. Not much different than most of us here I think.
"....with signs of light, followed by defeat, followed by light..."
There have been a few "Are you going to be around this weekend?" that I no longer respond to because someone had to break that pattern & it didn't look like it was going to be him.
Anyway, nice to hear from you & thanks for dropping by!
Hey K, the weather is just starting to get nice here....we'd have a great time I'm sure if you find a way to make it for a visit!
Strange weekend full of surprises, my former husband, whom I haven't talked to in years, got in touch with me. It looks like he'll be in my area soon & would like to get together. I'll have to give that some thought, although I hate to pass up the chance to see him again.
