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Thanks, Donna. I am so looking forward to feeling better. \:\)

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I sent it.

I am pathetic.

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no you arent', you are a loving person who is still getting used to not having a partner with whom you celebrated Father's day for so many years.

Mother's day also went unrecognized, but I made sure the kids got to talk to him, I was thinking about a txt but didnt', I hid behind kids, lol, bought a mug so kids can draw on it and kids gave it to him, so the gift wasn't really from me but from kids.

It makes you the bigger person by wishing him a happy father's day, not a pathetic one. Next year you will feel more at peace and will let go of any anxiety about not contacting him on that holiday.

If I havent' already done so, I highly highly recommend you read "Healed without Scars" by David Evans, it will help you tons hon, you are in my prayers)))))))))))))))))


Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2

30something
2kids
survivor of S, MLC, A, D
I have peace in my heart, at last.
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Here is a good rule of thumb:

If you have to agonize over personal communication that is supposed to be of a warm or loving nature, it is almost surely inappropriate, pursuing, and unwelcomed.


Appropriate expressions of warm and loving thoughts come easily and don't make you feel like crap in writing them, sending them, or waiting for a response.


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Any response, KL?

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no response, but then i think he's on vacation with his OW right now.

The email i sent was this:

"Hi H

Here's wishing you a Happy Father's Day. I always did admire your dedication to doing the right thing by Step-D18.

I just got back from my graduation. Bob showed up and it was great to see him.

Take Care,
W"

Bob is a mutual friend of ours who came to the ceremony just to be nice.

And I don't feel bad now for sending the email. The reason I did it is because we have had zero contact for months. Aren't we supposed to get "unstuck"? Or, "shake things up"?

If I am wrong, please tell me.

Last edited by Kimmie Lee; 06/17/08 07:21 PM.
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Good for you. Glad you no longer feel bad for sending it. It's not worth it.

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KL
Sorry for what you are going through.

I think old timer said it best.

"""If you have to agonize over personal communication that is supposed to be of a warm or loving nature, it is almost surely inappropriate, pursuing, and unwelcomed.


Appropriate expressions of warm and loving thoughts come easily and don't make you feel like crap in writing them, sending them, or waiting for a response.""""

If it were not so long, I would get it as a tatoo. I think I will just print it out.

I know I have a hard time with breaking down and sending communicades. I find the hardest thing to deal with is when there is no response. I don't think the knife could twist with any more force.

I tried letters and things before my divorce (before DB) and I have alsoe tried it knowing better in my last relationship. I can say for certain, it didn't work on either one. And I was too afraid to not try even knowing better.

I hope you hear what you want to hear. Good luck



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If you're at peace with it Kimmie then that's all that matters. In some cases it won't make a bit of difference but if it gave you some peace then that's all that matters. With me, everytime I didn't something or got something out I also gained some strength.

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Well, no reply, no nothing from H.

I give up. I will let this all end without another word.

Nothing I can do about it.

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