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#71066 03/11/00 01:26 AM
Joined: Oct 1999
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Dear John,

WOW!!!!!! You sound like quite a thoughtful H..... I am getting hungry just reading your post - especially about the cake - my H and I have given up sweets for Lent!

Add a little romantic conversation at bedtime, and you have given her the perfect birthday! As you no doubt already know, those of us on this board think that your wife is a really special person very deserving of this wonderful day!

I do look forward to hearing more from you.

Wesse

[This message has been edited by wesse (edited 03-10-2000).]


#71067 03/11/00 01:08 PM
Joined: Sep 1999
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FM,favorite martian,I have 3?'s
Does anything we say,get through to you while your spacing out,or is it better to leave you along?

Do you care about the kids,while your out and about?

Did you do things like read and keep a jurnal in order to keep your mind off of your spouce and family?

Peace



Thrive/dont just survive Think good thoughts Hug your kids peace
#71068 03/11/00 03:51 PM
Joined: Mar 1999
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Did you really think that the "grass was going to be greener"?

Tell me about the emotion of "I love you" but I'm not "in love" with you.

Thanks, Chelsea


#71069 03/11/00 06:56 PM
Joined: May 1999
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Johnswife Husband: Thank you thank you thank you for being bold enough to post here and battle through our questions! You are truely a gift from GOD for many of us - especially me!

I am sorry to say I didn't follow your wifes posts all that much so I don't now all your circumstances other than you two have to be elated to be back together as a family!

How bad was the guilt during the time you were away - was it nearly impossible tolook your wife in the eye to talk with her? Same with the kids?

Did you two actually file for divorce?

Did you finally realize you had enough with the OW or did she want to end it?

Lastly, had you cut off all contact with old friends and if so, are they slowly coming back into your life?

Thanks and save some roast for us! Happy Birthday Johnswife!

Missy


#71070 03/11/00 08:36 PM
Joined: Feb 2000
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Wow! Bet you didn't anticipate this kind of response did you? But you are most welcome here! Maybe you could give us all some insight on some things. My question for you is the same as Chelsea's. I need some insight on the "I love you, but not in love with you anymore" speech so many of us get here. To me, that just seems like an easy way out...too easy if you ask me, just doesn't make any sense that I can see. Love is a verb, either you love someone or you don't. That's how I look at it. Anyway, welcome aboard, looking forward to reading some more of your posts.

#71071 03/12/00 12:50 AM
Joined: Dec 1999
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Hello John (Martian)
Thank you so much for coming on this board and trying to help us all try to understand what our spouses may be doing to us. I have one question that comes to mind and I'm sure there are others on this board that would like the answer to the same question. Did you lie and lie again to try and push your wife away so that you could ease your guilt. My husband lies so much to me that he forgets what he even told me to begin with. I'm praying with all my heart that he IS doing the lying to try to push me away. He is not doing a very good job at it either. I sometimes actually think I love him more now than when we got married just for the simple fact that I feel I somehow know him a little bit better and that his absense has definetly made the heart grow stronger. So many times my friends complain about their husbands and I just cry. How I would like to have my husband at home to not do anything around the house, or to complain when something isn't done right. I tell them that they should thank their lucky stars because life throws strange curves and someday they may not be there for them to complain about. Any help you can give is most welcome to all of us here. Give your wife a big hug for her birthday and thank God everyday for her unconditional love for you.

Debbie


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