I have a friend that I work with that I am convinced is in an MLC, I thought I would share her story with everyone here. Her story begins about 5 years ago when she was obeesely overweight, but a very nice person with a great sense of humor. A relatevly new technique came on to the medical market guaranteed to make you lose weight, the gastric by pass surgery, she had it and lost a ton of weight. She came back to work after a layoff to recover, she was looking great! Thin for the first time in her life, thining down like that, so quickly, left its marks on her, so she needed some improvement surgery to snip, flatten, increase certain things. She got it, looked like a totally new person, getting looks and comments from people for the first time in her life, her feelings had begun to change somewhat during this time, she just didn't feel the same way about her husband anymore, didn't really love him, just married him because she felt sorry for him, you know the line. She dropped the bomb on him and divorced. Free at last she began hitting the club scene, young men found her attractive, and she took advantage of this for the first time in her life, took advantage of it many times to be exact. Partying, dating, having younger men, all for her, what a great new life!!! All the while she would tell me things about how great things were, but there was something missing, she still didn't regret her divorce, she really didn't love him ever. She finally meets the man she has waited for her whole life! What a guy!!! She is a top exec and he works at the gas company! A match made in Heaven!!! Oh BTW... I forgot to mention, he is still married with 2 kids, of course he cannot get a divorce himself, his W won't cooperate with him to do it. He moves in with her, what a life!! Everything is great for a little while, then he starts being demanding.... he is kinda jealous.... she starts picking at things....... she meets someone else..... one night stand...... he meets someone..... returns the favor.... They fight constantly, over everything, no trust between them, she is miserable, on medicine for her nerves, she confides in me about thier fights and how bad they are. I try to be a friend to her as much as I can, I ask her why she stays with him. She tells me that the passion is so strong she cannot leave. We talk about her previous marriage, she tells me that he is a great person, she just doesn't care about him, he is irresponsible, if he were more responsible, she would probably still be married. I asked her if her new man was responsible. She said, "he sure is" I replied that he left his family, (he is still married BTW) he didn't sound too responsible to me. (We have the type of friendship that we can shoot straight with each other like that) She defended him of course, I kinda let it go. We talk about her former marriage a little more, she tells me that he was good to her, worshiped her, but she wanted more, she just didn't have any feelings for him anymore. I talked to her last about 10 days ago, she looked like crap, they had a major fight, one to the point where she is seeing a theropist, she is on 3 different kinds of nerve medicine and even fell asleep at her desk. I just told her that she was a damn idiot for staying in that type of situation. I asked her what the appeal was in this guy. She told me that they had nothing in common, they fight all the time, but she just couldn;t be without him. I told her that this was her not wanting to admit that she made a mistake in being with him. She admited to me that she made a mistake getting a divorce, but she shouldn't have gotten married to begin with! LOL I asked her if she thought that it would get any better. She said that in the begining it was! I told her that at that point in time nothing was invested in the relationship, nothing to gain or lose! I told her that there was a term for what she was going through, she replied an MLC? I said absolutely! She said others had told her that, but she didn't believe it. I told her that the train ride was about over, be ready for a hard stop. I also told her that I was there for her if she needed to talk. Ladies and gentlemen, that is a true story. I witheld names for obvious reasons. I wanted to post this to show that at least some people who go through this are absolutely miserable in ways we may not realize.
Braveheart, Thanks for sharing this story. It's true, they leave seeking the forever happiness and when the train ride stops, they are still miserable. She hasn't figured out yet that happiness and contentment for oneself comes from within. She's still seeking it from outside sources. This, hopefully, will end very soon.
Have a very Merry Christmas and a happy New Year w/your family and friends.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Braveheart, Thanks for sharing this story. It's true, they leave seeking the forever happiness and when the train ride stops, they are still miserable. She hasn't figured out yet that happiness and contentment for oneself comes from within. She's still seeking it from outside sources. This, hopefully, will end very soon.
Have a very Merry Christmas and a happy New Year w/your family and friends.
You are so right Snodderly, I feel sorry for her, she is so miserable and cannot see why she is. I wish you a Merry Christmas as well!!!
