A few months ago my gf used my computer, and left her email open after she was done checking her email. The next day I opened my computer and there it was, I clicked out of it because I didn't want to invade her privacy. And the next time I went to yahoo.com, she was automatically logged in. We she must have hit remember my password on this computer, so after a few weeks I took a look. There was really nothing there except some new emails from a guy she saw before she met me. First off he deceived her and told her that he was single but she later found out he was married. He lives in another state and I think that she has had nothing to do with him since then. Well in the email I found he was planning a trip here to Florida and really wanted to see her because he "missed her friendship". Well before he came down she had an emergency surgery and was out of commission when he was in town. I took care of her and was in the hospital with her the entire time, she also would have been screwed if I hadn't put her on my health insurance. Her surgery was like $55,000. I really love this woman and I have never been the jealous type, she tells me all the time that she loves me and wants to spend the rest of her life with me. However the fact that she keeps talking to this guy really is upsetting to me. So far I have not found anything that says she is cheating physically, there is no "I miss you, love you", or anything like that. About a month ago she had coffee with him, and nothing happened as I found another email from him describing the event. The guy is still married. I am looking for an email that says she is really happy and involved with me, and I have not found that. She is awesome to my son and treats him like her own. I don't know what to make of it all really confused why she is carrying something on like this...it is not going anywhere. She lives with me and is putting up her condo for rent to help me with the bills. What do I do? Should I wait it out? or confront her? I feel if I confront her she will cut it out but I really would like to know if she is a cheater or not. I think that by doing nothing it will really tell me if thats the case, which will be helpful to know so that I do not marry that person. I really want to trust her and I have been really cool and acted like nothing is wrong, but I don't know how long I can go on like this it seems that there is no integrity here.
I'm not much for giving advice, but I can tell you need to get this to some kind of resolution NOW. First, I would not let her know that you can see her email. Does she know that you know she has seen him? If so I would try to get a situation where the 3 of you are together, then you should be able to subtly make him aware that you are together and with her. Then you might check her email after the event and see what the tone of there conversation is. There is no problem with men or women having relationships with others of the opposite sex, as long as all there conversations and actions are things they would still do if you where there with them.
She doesn't know anything about my knowledge of her. I doubt we can get together 3 of us as he doesn't know about me, even though she is living with me. And I don't know what you can call a relationship they dont have one, it just a guy who is trying to reconnect with his past only for sex.
How long have you guys been together and what are you ages?
Has she told you she met him for coffee or is that something you read?
has she given you any other reason to doubt her during your R?
When she found out OM was M, did she end the R?
Based on the little you've said, I wouldn't say she's doing anything wrong. She's been meeting a old friend. If she's hiding it from you that's different. If she's telling you, you might mention that it bothers you a little bit. Not that you don't trust her, but not him. See where it goes.
More info would be helpful.
If i can't fall in love... I'd like to fall in chocolate! ~ Author Unknown
