I have been torn as to whether to post in Infidelity or move here to Piecing, but things seem to be moving toward a better M for H and I, so here I am. I have been reading Piecing posts from the beginning, and have learned so much from you good people. This board and the friends I've made here have been invaluable to helping me get through this.
Here's a quick recap of my sitch:
H had two As from May 04 to July 06, when I found out for sure that he was being unfaithful. We were separated from July 06 to April 07 when H moved home. In the last four weeks or so, he has been everything I've asked for and more. He is open, seems happy to be with me, is spending the majority of his time with us--basically the husband I've been missing for the past three years with some bonus improvements.
I have experienced some fear of this all being a show, and we've had a hiccup or two, but so far everything seems to be headed in the direction of putting everything back together. I'm making conscious effort to keep my fear of being betrayed again under control and focusing on the positives in my sitch.
Aud, Congrats on making the BIG move..from now on I wont have to jump so far across the tracks to visit. I am not so sure I am quite ready to bring the "M" U-Haul over here quite yet but glad to see you here..peace
Thanks Cat, Phoenix and Whapu...My internet connection has been down for 24+ hours. Can you say LOST?! H has joked that I'm amazingly more productive around the house when I'm cut off from the net. Hee hee, if he only knew. Eh, maybe he does.
Nothing too profound going on at my house today--just a bunch of toddlers and pre-schoolers to chase.
I am doing a lot of thought-swapping...kicking my fears right out of my head. I had a bit of a relapse yesterday morning when I got too nosy with some myspace pages, but I'm back on the wagon and keeping my head where it needs to be: with my H whose actions are speaking much louder than words.
Yeh, the nosy stuff will "kill ya", just don't. I think to often either we're looking at old history, or are going to put a negative spin on whatever we see. To often I have found it wasn't what I thought it was, so a lot of energy was wasted in worrying. Some things I would say are better left in the background, since they will dampen your drive and determination.
Focus on the positive and the work you have done on yourself.
Aud, There isn't two words in the english language that I hate more than MYspace! How such a cool idea could have gotten so out of hand is beyond me but try to stay clear of that as much as possible. I still have to go on there just because of my oldest sons deal but I stay FAR FAR away from my W's Myspace now. No good came from that. I hope you are cozy in the new "digs" around here and hope you have a fruitful weekend without any drama...peace
The weekend was mostly good...H spent two days playing with his mega-quad, and though I'm mostly supportive of his guy time, I got a little annoyed when it got to be too much. A good thing I am noticing in our R: instead of stewing and fuming and saying nothing, I'm making more effort to stand up and communicate about things that upset me, and we are talking through our disagreements more. And then we moved on, took the kids on an hour drive and had a pleasant time together.
Two good things H did: 1-After his day 1 ride, he came home and quickly/voluntarily took care of no less than three small jobs I had asked him to do prior to his ride. 2-When he knew he was not going to make it home on time from his day 2 ride, he called to let me know instead of just showing up four hours late.
I'm still feeling the twinges of fear/anger that are most likely normal, but I'm dealing pretty well, and putting my trust in the positives. He's home, he's plugged-in, he's doing things he never did before. I would have killed for that a year ago.
