"The grass is always greener when you don't p on it."
Depends. Where I live, urine quickly breaks down into urea which is almost pure nitrogen, and thus an excellent fertilizer. I have noticed my backyard needs no ferlizer due to the dogs using it as a bathroom.
Last edited by TimeHeals; 08/09/1006:41 PM.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
Another example of what can happen when you finally let go..
The SOONER you let go, the faster and the better the reconciliation...
More proof from "gutwrenching"......
Quote:
I took the advice of Gucci and Steve McQueen and made sure she knew I was letting her go...and things changed quickly.
In her words - the reality of what I was doing finally hit me and I didn't like it. I didn't like who I had become. I didn't like what OM had turned me into. I wanted my H, my M, my family back. And then you were distancing yourself quickly, you wouldn't even answer my texts for hours, and I didn't like it. My gut was telling me I was doing the wrong thing. Combine that with pressure from OM and OM starting to act "like an @shole#$" and I got the "I wish I had never met him. He almost ruined my life. I thought it was what I wanted, it took the reality of you driving away with the kids to make me realize I was wrong and had to break it off immediately, for good, for real this time"
Letting go has been tough for me because, I admit, I am a bit of a control freak. Managing others has helped me to learn that when you delegate you need to let that person succeed or fail on their own (unless of course I'm going to take the fall and then I have to take control ).
Since I am having a hard time not asking questions while I continue to do my 180, I'm trying to think of the lawyer as a task I have delegated to H. He started it - he can finish it. All I can do is be the W I want to be in any M. I can't control what he does - and to that extent I have "let go" of the outcome. Yet, I act "as if" I am happy and everything's fine and avoid questions that will rock the boat.
I'm not sure I have the patience for him to take some action with regard to the lawyer, account, etc. But I'm trying. Not pouncing on this stuff is a real 180 for me.
He: WAH Me: LBW Precious: DD
~ I'm grateful for every day I have to improve the way I relate.
I have been living in limbo with WAW for about 4 months. During that time i have been trying to LRT , slipping up sometimes, trying to figure out what would possess her to give up our good life.
No EA or PA as far as I could tell after much investigation, no real explanations ( real to me anyway ) etc. She was angry, silent and just really unpleasant to be around.
yesterday she did something that really annoyed and frustrated me and I decided i had had enough and just gave her the speech.
"If you dont want to be with me then leave, I will do everything I can within reason to facilitate that. It doesn't work for me me to be with someone who does not want to be here"
I then sat down and worked out the finances, decided on division of property, figured out how and when we will put the house up for sale.
I discussed all this calmly and quietly and without too much emotion except she teared up at one stage.
Funny thing happened after that. Her anger seemed to evaporate and we started talking pleasantly and the complete dynamic of our relationship changed. The "I want out of here NOW" attitude changed.
She will still leave and i will encourage her to do so. We needed something to shake things up and this I feel is it. If at some time she WANTS to come back then i will figure out what works for me.
After it was all over I had my first solid nights sleep in 4 months and felt like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulder.
As a previous poster said. Whats the worst thing that can happen THEY WILL LEAVE well THEY WERE LEAVING ANYWAY
Me 36; H 40 baby born in May M:13, T:15 Bomb (OW): Dec 09 began DBing: Feb WH overseas with OW old: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2027369#Post2027369
).