Originally Posted By: Jeff223
What I tried to say is that it did not affect me; or, to be very honest, not even close to as much as it would have just months ago. Why? B/c I see her for what she is.

oh how I relate to this statement.

I always saw my wife as she was when I met her, I really did, in my minds eye she was this incredibly beautiful 18 yr old that treated me like a king. then after her affair , all the "truths" started coming out and I finally saw her for what she IS. when my eyes finally opened, I saw a mean, self centered 41 yr old woman, who I didn't recognize.

I spent 20 plus years making excuses for her, I guess they call it "denial" everyone around me saw it, but I "Loved" her too much to see it.

once the blinders come off, it's easy to detach, it's easier to make sound decisions for you and your kids.

seeing them in their true light helps regain a self of yourself, at least it did for me.