Advice from Hurting...Happy Jim-

I just want to let everyone know that it is possible to save your marriages and it may come just out of the blue like with me or it may come slowly. There are a couple of things I would like to share with you all that I know contributed to my marriage being saved. 1) DB'ing.....Do it because it works. I never got to the LRT but I did do the 180. And it was the best 180 ever recorded. And you know what, I have never been happier with myself than I am right now. Doing the 180 allowed me to see what I had been doing so wrong for so long. It really opened my eyes.
2) PATIENCE.....This is something I have never had before and once I learned it I found out that is was really easy to have and to keep. 3) Come here and post very often.....I have been here to read posts and to post my own story probably 1,000 times. I became a voracious reader of these posts here. Learn from what people write here. 4) Read everything you can and don't force it on your spouse.....I left the books lying around the house and my W never picked one up other than to move it. I only asked her to read one book and fortunately it was one I never had to let her read ( it was on controlled separations). 5) Pray alot to God or whatever HP you believe in. It helps keep your faith up and gives you strength to keep going. 6) Go to advice for wise DB'ers and read everything there especially the mandatory do's and don'ts. They really helped me.

[This message has been edited by Michele (edited 05-29-2000).]



The Divorce Buster