quote: Okay, how does one do this and not give the impression of being "clingy?"
aplomando, I will add some thoughts while you wait for JJ?s answer (learned some of these techniques from him): Practice validation, showing respect, honest communication, active listening etc. Most spouses pursue their WAS and cross the boundaries the WAS has set up. This only serves to aggravate the WAS, they feel like their spouse is being needy, clingy or pursuing etc.
When the WAS is given their space, at some point they will need to or want to communicate with their spouse for a variety of reasons and those are the opportunities where the Dber can be empathetic, genuine, validating, respectful, not defensive etc. There is a difference between practicing active listening or using validating techniques and being clingy.
People want to be understood but when they have reached the point of being a WAS, they first want relief and they want their space. The opportunity to demonstrate unconditional love will present itself almost every time. C2H
Committed2Him- "C2H" All Things (Back from Spain!)...18