Hi smilie! I hope wayfarer's stories help. I'll add my preparations to ensure I'd come out okay if I D'd began before I made a final D / no-D decision. Just now I'm imagining my XW scratching her head months after I left and imagining, "Eureeka! So that's why he was so eager to see me switch from breastfeeding to pumping. He planned to leave a year before he left!!" In case that sounds odd, breastfeeding is a factor courts consider in some states when awarding custody.