Thank you all so much for listening and responding. I watched this for a while but didnt see any responses so I went back to everyone elses threads. I just happen to look back this morning and noticed your responses today. Thank you!!!!
He does not live in the home. He began staying out all night in June 2018 then in October 2018 I ask him to either commit back to the marriage or leave. He left!
Update- I took some advice of yours and I have began venturing out a little more on my own and have gained a little more independence. It feels good! I even took a girls trip to the Bahamas last month. Things with him seem to be the same but slightly different to. He has been a bit more withdrawn lately. For the first time in 3 years he has some personal recognition. He has sent messages Im so lost and you do know I liked my old life right. He took the kids to a place we use to go a few weekends ago and he sent a message that said this makes me sad not happy. Oddly enough there has actually been some genuine affection from him also. Ive not had that in 3 years!!! Dont worry- Im not overly excited about it, its nice but it mostly scares me. He told me that I looked pretty last week. I about fell over (literally)!! He seems to be very open with me and we have lots of communication. He has began having lots of trouble sleeping and he has poured himself into work lately. He has always been active with the kids but seems to be even more lately.