My issue is that she says she wants me to show her I can be vulnerable and open with her (whether their is any truth to that is another conversation) which I could attempt if I felt like we were both working on things. As long as she's on dating sites I can't open myself up like she says she wants me too. She's getting her cake and eating it too while I'm over here eating sh!t sandwiches. Since we are already 75% separated (sharing an apartment and taking turns co-parenting) I see it as going to 100% and removing the family stuff we agreed to. That way I can focus more on me without the weekly reminders of how messed up things are or getting lulled back into a sense of false security.
Like I said....
She fired you from that job...
She is actively seeking a relationship outside of your marriage...
Why would you be vulnerable to her ?
Aloof , yet available..... was my way through it...
Validate when you can, yet remember that you are NOT her emotional support at the moment.
Let her "miss" you , and feel the ramifications of her decision.
Not to punish her in any way...just because you are too busy in 'you' , to give away any of your power....
