I think it’s not time to be nice or to try anymore.
How many times have you said this already? You’re a broken record.
“I’m going to be tough. She contacted me. I played into her hands. Now I feel [censored]. I’m definitely done. I’m going to be tough, that’ll get her back!”
Rinse and repeat, round and round we go.
I give up on you Steve. Until you go and see a professional for some serious, high intensity counselling, you will keep doing what you’ve always done.