Thanks for the support. Yeah Sandi I felt really stupid being played after she told me she didn’t want to talk about the R anymore. I do feel slightly better for saying some of the things I did mean about forgiving her and still loving her because I did mean them and I sort of felt good to have her hear them even if she doesn’t deserve it. I definately won’t be doing that again. She is completely blinded by her limerance for her new man and new life. Pretty obvious now. She’s not even texting me angry stuff anymore. I did ask the VA to get me into some therapy, as far as the holidays go I am working all of them this year so I didn’t have to sit at home. She has plans to spend Xmas with our kids and her new family. I didn’t want to be around for that. It’s gonna be really hard I know it. I’m already looking ahead to come up with some plans or something I can do to occupy my time. I’ll have a lot more on my hands coming up. I hope the fitness center where I live opens up soon. Other than that can take some long walks do some push ups, sit ups etc. once this knot of anxiety leaves my chest I’ll be good to go.
She did text me today asking about our son’s fall picture. I responded with the link from the school only. She said she would order them and send me them framed. I said only “I appreciate it” that was it.
T:11 M:10 K: D5, S7 BD: 9/1/20 WW moved in with OM 10/15/20 WW left OM 01/20/2021. I paid last fees and pushed the D 5/3/2021 OM returned 5/4/2021 WW Left OM again 6/1 WW spinning-current