Midlife wife crisis 16

[SteveLW]

Wolf, I have friends like you and I see many of the same struggles. They really come to me and want me to make their decisions for them. Which I refuse to do. I will give them advice, things to think about, but the decision is theirs.

Same with this forum. We don't tell people "what to do". We give perspective, advice, and warning......but is up to the poster to decide. I think you should tell her she has 2 months to move out, that you will support your child, and move on with your life as this kid's father, but not the kid's mother's husband. All I can do is type "that is what I think you should do". But it is up to you to decide.

However, we give you the advice we give you based on the details you choose to share.....or not share. That is where AS is coming from. "She would be destitute without me" to "she is a flight attendant" doesn't jive. We were giving you advice based on her being destitute. And here she is able-bodied and gainfully employed. See how that could change the advice? You received some advice that was very empathetic with her plight, when the reality wasn't quite what you made it out to be.

So yes, this is a safe place. But is also a place where we will call out things that do not make sense. Or when sound advice is ignored (like don't date, let alone impregnate, someone while you are rebounding!) us pointing back to that previous advice and pointing out why we gave that advice. That is as much for everyone else that comes here struggling with similar situations as it is for you. But the bottom line is why even post here if you aren't going to at least consider the collective experience and wisdom found here?

WM, you keep doing you.....and doing what you feel you should. But there will be times we call you out if you are being inconsistent! You came back here admitting you'd screwed up jumping into this relationship, and all of the problems it caused. And then as soon as the sex gets good again, you are all in again. All we want for you is the best, and that you look at things with the perspective necessary to make the best decision.