I would wait for someone more experienced to comment on your conversation, but i would say you did the right thing. You are finally standing up for yourself and your kids. He will have to work really hard to get you back! He seems rather unstable, he needs to sort his life out.
Money wise and this has worked for us so far. Lets say all bills and mortgage come to 1500 a month, he pays 1300 and i pay the rest and cover food costs for me and the boys. This is just what we have agreed for now. If you can agree without solicitors advice for now then do so.
I think you are doing great and i hope you are taking time for yourself each evening, to do something just for you.