1) Physical Attraction. Diet and exercise. I lost 30 pounds. I've gained 15 back, but I steadied there. I was almost too skinny at one point. Dress up more. I don't wear t-shirts (summer time) and hoodies (winter time) 90% of the time anymore. I quit chewing (more than two years now). I get more sleep. 2) Emotional Attraction. I read NMMNG. While I don't think a lot of it relates to me, some of it didn't resonate. I'm trying to be more alpha (without being a dink). My needs are not last on my list anymore. I'm not afraid to rock the boat. I'm back to my former fun self (more social). I treat my GF well, but I don't treat her like her sh|t doesn't stink. 3) Faith. I attend church more regularly. I do more bible study. 4) GAL. I volunteer more (until COVID hit). I reconnected with family and friends. I've gotten back into camping, fishing and hunting. I travel more (until COVID hit). 5) Improvements. I've worked on my procrastination. If something needs to get done, I do it. I've become handier around the house. I cook more.
Harvey, that is a great list! I resonate with point #1 a bit, because about the time my STBXW started planning her exit I was kind of heavy, and while I"m a good looking guy when I'm 35 pounds overweight I don't carry it well. I expect that if love is teetering on the edge, part of what puts a woman over the edge is looking at an overweight husband and saying to herself, "I don't even like how he looks anymore!" I've since lost 20 pounds and look good, but want to get down another 15 so I look fantastic. I've been holding at the current weight since last December.
If you don't mind, tell me a little more about NMMNG with your GF. What specifically did you change? I can imagine both the trivial (e.g., where you go to dinner or which movie to watch) to the non-trivial ("it's time for me to meet your parents" rather than "whenever you think it's the right time").