You sound much, much better Ginger!! I LOVE that you are developing friendships with other women who want to go out and socialize. I focused hard on that after BD and it made a huge difference.

Re: dating apps. I definitely think you attract better guys when you are feeling at the top of your game. I think that has been a difference for me this time around as opposed to the first time I tried it. I was feeling pretty crappy about myself then but this time I had a lot more confidence. Not to say that I didn’t have my insecure moments but when I did, I would just go through my list of things that make me a catch (similar to the list UR provided for you).

My best advice to you would be that once you are feeling better about yourself and where you are at, just go out and have a good time. When you are in a good place confidence-wise, it really shows in how you carry yourself and in your interactions with others. It makes you much more attractive. Also...one of the things that helped me the most is that I watched a lot of YouTube videos about attraction, dating, etc... There are some great coaches out there who put out some helpful videos that put you in a great mindset when you eventually start to go out on dates again.

Re: your daughter. Mine turns 13 in December. I know EXACTLY what you are going through. I agree with everyone else...it is completely normal. It does hurt sometimes but knowing that, I think, helps you to not take it personally which you definitely shouldn’t.

Re: your dad. I think your idea about accepting his offers but having zero expectations he will follow through is the way to go. That way, when he doesn’t, you won’t be overly hurt by it. But if he does, you will get to be pleasantly surprised. Way better to be surprised that disappointed. (((HUGS)))


Me 51
H 46
B/G Twins 11
SD19
Legal SA - January 2019
Divorce filed - June 2019
Divorce final - November 2019

Together 14 years
Married 12 years
BD1 - May 2014
BD2 - September 14, 2018