IW, thank you for the message. What your parents went through and put you guys through sounds brutal. I see now what helped you obtain your ironwill. We are cordial for the kids. For me at the time being, its going ok even though I am harbouring all the ill feelings and thoughts towards W. Maybe it'll be easier to let them go after D.
It was rough, but we got through it. Much like life. Thank you though
My point was that you can start working on forgiveness. Its going to take a while to get fully there. No time like the present though
Originally Posted by Core
Right now, this person ended my dream, my families dreams and my kids chances of a complete family and stable future. Shes messing me up financially for years to come, im turned off to any LTRs and Im stuck in a part of the world I didnt want to stay in for at least 17 years. All this over feelings. She initiated an R chat yesterday. She forgot the good, got validation of the bad and now thinks she never truly loved me and that someone else will make her happy. She admitted to one or two of her own issues but the solution isnt or wasnt to work on them. Ending the M and finding someone new is the solution. She felt like there were problems for awhile and it ate her up. FELT. She even admitted it was a feeling and may not have been really what happened but the feeling is what mattered. A feeling over reality. F that, no more LTRs for me. Admittedly even if her perception was wrong, the feeling she recieved dictates destroying what we had. She wishes we did more things romantically....she apparently forgot the first several years and her stopping those things.
How can I forgive that? I still get why I should but how I dont yet see. She has no idea what she wants but her and her family and friends know for sure that I'm the cause of unhappiness.
Were looking at a year a least to find a house in this market. Even longer to win one and afford it. This hell all over temporary feelings is just garbage in my opinion.
Core - you are still very attached. Re-read that paragraph.
Do you think understanding why she did what she did will bring her back? Will it solve the puzzle? Will it give you peace of mind?