36. It is best to stay away from the bar scenes where other problems easily arise. 37. NEVER LIE! When getting a life or trying to be mysterious….do not lie in order to be able to do it. You can be somewhat vague about what your plans are by not revealing all the details, but never even resemble lying to your spouse! Lying is not Dbing, so if you cannot carry out GAL on a particular time schedule without lying about what you are doing, then keep the trust and don’t lie to your spouse. 38. Do not keep company with the opposite sex. Do not turn to old friends of the opposite sex to talk to about your problems or just to hang out with them. This is not getting a life! This is not acceptable for a MR in trouble and could lead to you getting involved in an EA. If you cannot have your spouse present while you are with the friend of the opposite sex…..then you do not need to be with that friend. That includes any type of regular calls, emails, TM’s, etc., with friends of the opposite sex without the spouse present. You may not understand the seriousness, but it would be like pouring gasoline on a fire. 39. Do not backslide from your hard earned changes.
So is it that the only reason to not have time/support of members of opposite sex is strictly due to risk of EA???
I have a dear childhood friend who has been the for me thru this bigtime. He lives several states away. There is NO risk of EA. We have always had a special friendship to the point a teacher in high school gave us nicknames that we still use to this day.
Now, now H knows he is a close friend. And shortly after BD... he made a horrible comment that now I could be with this with friend... no desire... never going to happen. H also got into my FB acct and saw that we had been messaging and read those messages... which were in fact all about H and my regrets in the relationship in regards to how I dropped the ball... my pain... etc. H also admitted after trying to hack into my acct that he thought this friend was in town... NOT the case and i made it clear to H that he is not in town.
Did I see myself back by leaning on this friend who is opposite sex... and H is feeling justified in then having an A???
Ther is no risk of EA with this friend... ever but is that the only reason to avoid friends of the opposite sex?