Thank you for sharing this scout. I’m trying to figure this out also, but another thing in my sitch is H’s depression- so I’m always thinking about my words and action now how it will affect him psychologically. Is he using that as a crutch so I am focused on his needs? Maybe......
Now I know a lot of the things he did in our M was not okay. But he was the broken one, so I always felt like I had to be compassionate and “understand” him in that way. And in doing so I put my sense of self away. My feelings were not valued as much.
Anyways, again- thank you for the post.
BD: Sep 2019 H moved out: Oct 2019 3 kids under 12