Once you get some of the hurdles, it will get better. Stay on your lawyer to ensure your h is served. You do need to ask your lawyer about filing the taxes and then advise your h that you are filing separate and how many dependents you are claiming.
Unfortunately, when it comes to divorce, no one truly wins. You have to look at this as a business deal and once you get all of this taken care of...you will feel much better and not so tense and anxious.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.