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I would stay silent for the moment about the OM. Step back, give her space and time to figure herself out. The OM is nothing more than a band aid to her issues and she's using him to make herself feel better.
No relationship talks unless she brings it up! Right now you need to LISTEN when she speaks. Do not offer up advice unless she asks for it. The words silent and listen use the same letters to spell out each word. Just a bit of trivia...food for thought.
Dig deeper for patience and keep the focus on you. One last thing...BREATHE!
Also, please read the links that I provided to you last evening. Here is one more valuable link that you need to read today and begin working on:
Last edited by job; 12/31/1912:37 PM. Reason: added a link to another thread
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.