Wow, lots of good comments - perhaps more feedback and discussion that I've had on my thread in a while. I wish I had firm answers but to much of it I simply do not. Dawn, thanks for clarifying and others thanks for helping. I guess I'm not sure I will ever know what the real truth is. Wild Girl as she would point out herself on more than one occasion said she may not be book smart but she was very street smart. She would sit back and observe and read people and was pretty good at it. So did she read me and simply tell me what she thought I wanted to hear? Perhaps. I got the feeling that she was not looking for serious but perhaps that was her protection mechanism? She clearly went very fast with the current guy she is still with and yes, she may have cheated for a week with me while in international waters, but I don't see any indication she's done that with anyone since - certainly not with me. It's the same with the baby - it was my gut feeling she wanted a baby - she never said as much. Maybe she wanted an R - just not with me. Maybe she wanted an R with me but knew I did not? Maybe she simply felt something with this guy that she never felt before and he is "the one." I really don't know and honestly have no reason to give it all that much thought. She held things very close to the vest. Her mom told me more than once she has always been like that. I am pretty sure that some to many of the things she said were not the full truth - remember, pay attention to what they do, not what they say. About the only thing she told me for sure and said it multiple times, was that the age difference bothered her. Not like she didn't want to be seen with me or anything, just that I was not at all her norm - with her last serious BF being near 10 years younger than her. She even talked with her BFF about that. The rest, I have thoughts but can't be certain.
If Wild Girl was a fluke in the way you guys seem to think, what does that say for me and my dating possibilities? I need another fluke to come along? You may not be wrong as I think the last time I dated the same woman 30 days/30 times (including the 10 days on the cruise) was 5 years ago. If being turned down by, what 6 or 7 women to go on the cruise is another example, yeah, maybe she was a fluke. Those of you who claim 40 year olds with kids only want LTR or mostly want LTR - I guess it could be. I can't help but think and I totally include myself in this statement - that we think most people want the same things that we want - so who knows?
I certainly don't feel like I have as many opportunities as you seem to think I do Dawn. Or maybe I'm missing opportunities? I would say if I'm going to paint with a broad brush and talk in general terms, it's not just women older than me that I am not attracted to - it's most women I meet. Even some that I had an interest in and some cases did ask out, many I've come to clearly determine they were not or are not my match - or I'm not their's. This includes women that I at first thought there could be something there and pursued it - only to find out she's not for me.
As for suggesting I try OLD again... LOL hmmmmm, well, did you happen to see my comments and thoughts on OLD over the years - including some here accusing me of bashing OLD? So I should try it again but set the parameters older? Yeah, I'm not so sure about that one.
I'm mostly just living life. I've not been trying to date, other than the cruise. Maybe I should. If I met someone I was interested in I would pursue her - it's just not really happened, or if it does, there are complications or they are not interested or there are red flags or on and on. I am complex - at least I think I am. I am not a big drinking, party guy - never have been. Yet I don't at all act my age and most people are shocked when they learn my age. I don't think that is just looks I think it's also how I act. I was very mature at 17 and had started my own business by then. I was in many ways 30 or 35 at 17 and am still 30 or 35 now at 56.
But I also have some other life things going on that are shaking me up a bit this week. Perhaps it is time to do some things different with my life. I've been more retired than not for the last 2 years and have not worked full-time now in 10 years. But I'm too young to retire - as I just pointed out in the paragraph above. Finding the right person is a tough order for me. Hmmmmmmm, perhaps Wild Girl was a fluke - in more ways than you or I first thought.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D