Lol I do struggle to validate now that we are going to start negotiating things that will affect the rest of my life. I canít confuse validation with accepting a raw deal.

My W uses a lot of emotional reasoning (as we all do). Validating those emotions while disagreeing with the reasoning and still standing up for myself is tricky to navigate.

Today she texted she wants to review our schedule. She said she is bummed having 2 straight weekends without the kids. I could have validated but instead just sent her the schedule. (I also found it strange she does not have this written down but ok).

Thanks all for recentering me. I need to validate not for self protection anymore, but mostly to try to manage the situations so they donít escalate emotionally. I have simple needs. 50-50 long term and a reasonable financial settlement. The rest is just noise. Unless I am forgetting something?