Hi DS

Gym is going well. Let's just say - for the gig I had at the weekend, I found it a lot easier to move my timpani from the car to the venue! Have a 'catch-up' session with someone at the gym on Wednesday to see how things are going. I have been able to up the number of reps for each exercise machine. I'm getting better at the shoulder press too, which is increasing my confidence and am doing well in the cycling/spin class too.

You're right - previously, in the M I would basically do everything to sort stuff. I'd find out who to call, contact them, arrange times, let W know, and organise payment (then she'd reimburse me half once done). I'd sort out all the finances, bills, utilities etc. I even did both our tax returns - I stress that I did that not because of NGS, but it's what I do for my job, and her return is very easy, even though she has no idea about tax and is rubbish at keeping records - I would get her to sort it all out first before I even touched the numbers, to her immense consternation!

Now, for this smoke alarm/window issue, all I'm going to do is get the contact numbers/find out who to actually speak to (I'm not sure if this is covered by our warranty with the builder or not), then give those tradesmen W's number so SHE has to arrange a time for them to turn up.

I have no idea what her schedule is now, so it is totally pointless for me to have to call a tradesman, they suggest a time, I have to contact W to check if that works for her, go back, change the time, check again, etc.
As the famous meme goes, "Ain't nobody got time for that!"

I spent the rest of the weekend with my mum looking at houses in the town where my sister lives. Seems ideally placed - not too far from work (10-15min drive which is fine), much closer to family, etc. No contact from the estate agents regarding our current house sale, so assume no-one's viewed it yet.

I don't think there are any matters that is a joint thing to be wrapped up - not yet anyway.

Sometimes things go well and I am confident that what I've replied to is appropriately business-like, using the 'as if' mentality, feeling that I'm detaching enough etc. Problem is, other times I do worry about how to respond (like in this instance).


Me - 36, W - 32
No kids
T - 8 yr, M - 3 yr
Discovery - 14 May 2019
S - 25 May 2019 & D bomb - 29 July 2019
D & House sale final - Feb 2020