B... IMO you should NOT contribute to your wife losing her job whether you want to R or not. You think your son is being impacted now? The fallout from all of that would impact him much, much more. Trust me. You do NOT want that for him and you do not want to make your situation any uglier than it already is. Take the focus off of her and what she is doing and put it fully back on yourself.

Yes it is a maddening situation. My XH secretly moved in with his coworker while we were still married. I am a therapist in the community who works very closely with the schools in our community including the school he teaches at. Only six months before all of that, we hosted his staff Christmas party. For sure other people knew about the affair before I did. The shame is his though, not mine. I hold my head up high and choose better not bitter. As time has gone on and my feelings have faded, I am beyond glad that I did not act on any of my angry feelings as it kept things amicable between me and my XH and, more importantly, my kids have adjusted as well as could be expected. They were able to do that because they saw that I was okay. Did it also make things easier on my XH who absolutely did not deserve to have it be easy? For sure it did... but I dont care about that... I care about my kids. And I believe in karma and my XH has boatloads coming his way.

I KNOW how painful this is. It is the WORST pain I have EVER gone through. I did not think I would ever get through it. It shook me to my core and I still have moments of disbelief and anger but they are just moments and, for the most part, I am happy to be living an authentic life surrounded by people who love and care for me. You will get through this B. And when you do and you look back on everything, you will be ever so glad you took the high road and were a good role model to your son. GAL and show him what AMOAFWL really looks like. (((HUGS)))

Me 51
H 46
B/G Twins 11
Legal SA - January 2019
Divorce filed - June 2019
Divorce final - November 2019

Together 14 years
Married 12 years
BD1 - May 2014
BD2 - September 14, 2018