And Ginger, having gone through similar just recently myself I know that we can get caught up on the over-analyzing. What you felt was real. And your reality is that he loved you too. Accept that as being the reality.
We hear it all the time here. People re-writing history and coming up with bogus and vague reasons for ending a relationship. "I never loved you", "you use too much cheese in your lasagna", "your house has too many stairs". Rarely do you hear people talk about the real reasons. Perhaps they don't know them themselves. And it doesn't really matter. It's them.
I believe you have a few days off coming up. I hope you take that time to just chill out and relax. You've got your D who I hope is taking this OK but will probably struggle a bit and your little leg-humper who probably won't notice other than the fact that you are hurting.
Then find you again. It's easy to get lost in a relationship I've found. Stay out of the dating pool for a while. Somebody peed in it anyway.
Big hugs my friend ((((Ginger1))))
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells