Oh G.....I'm sorry you went to bed upset. It sounds like M just has a lot of work to do that you have already done and you may have to kind of wait for him to catch up. Do NOT stop talking and asking for what you want/need. Do NOT feel guilty and do not be afraid to ask because if he reacts poorly, that should be a STRONG message to you about how your future will be with him. Hang in there and don't chase him. Let him come to you.

Me 50, H52
Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014
Marriage #2 12/31/2019
5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships)
4 grandkids (plus 2 on the way)