Ginger...it's great that you realize the importance of speaking out with your feelings instead of keeping it within and discard them. I was the same way with my ex and I see now how that was unhealthy. Thing is I also get the worry that if you do express your feelings, your partner might just rebel and go find someone else. That fear that by being your real self and expressing yourself it might cause your partner to leave...it shouldn't be like that and I've learned that if/when I do express myself and my partner can't deal with it, then it's for the best that our relationship end as they weren't the right person for me.
I was talking to a girl recently who said "I want to be a priority and not a conveinence". From what you've said of M, I get the sense he is more closed into his own world and when not conveinent for him, it's his way only. Living with his Mommy, needing his Sundays, etc...no matter his great traits that would be a concern to me. Also now maybe you're not super comfortable at expressing your feelings and needs, but to me it sounds more like he has the greater work to do on the communication with you or more accurately the compromising and adjusting some of his actions based upon the feelings you communicate to him. You say "I need to fix this". Fair you have you're own things to work on, I just think you fixing you, doesn't fix the overall issue.
Just sounds like to me you and M are still working to sort out the needs and feelings each of you have AND how to be able to communicate those to each other and work together so that each of you gets what you needs. And for whatever reason, yep us guys can come off completely oblivious from time to time. Most men don't intentionally try to be that way, usually we do have the best of intentions, but there will be times where we'll be clueless when you think we should know. I saw this one video online and the guy was like "He's gonna pluck your last nerve and he's gonna do it over, and over and over again...and he ain't even gonna know he's doing it." Definitely accurate, just when stuff happens, be straight up and tell him. Don't be afraid how your true feelings might affect him.