Decided to take a break even though we are in “crisis” mode at work today. But I need to take a rest for a moment.

I am full of anxiety today. Which isn’t my norm. I just feel like crying.

My coworker who is the sweetest thing ever, but talks way too much is quitting her job to move to another state to help her daughter with her children. She confides in me, releases her stress on me, and leans to me for opinions and help. She can’t wait to help her daughter, be with her grandchildren, etc.

And I find myself so incredibly jealous. I wish I had a mother who was alive and well who wanted to give me a hand and enjoyed it. I wish For it so bad. Going through all of this alone is HARD. No guidance from a mom, no help from mom, sibling, or anything. I love my dad, he is retired, but doesn’t come and help. He’s an hour and a half away and I see him maybe once a month. He’s living his own life.

It stinks. And as far as M..... he’s going through his own headache right and hasn’t asked me much about myself lately. I hinted to him I’m struggling a bit and he didn’t have anything to offer.

Feeling alone stinks.