* The H has had an EA/PA. He flirts with other women, even in front of his W. The H is guilty of inappropriate behavior with women. He compares his W to other women, making her feel inadequate and insecure. He openly shows how he is checking out another woman, in the presence of his W. He talks excessively about the new woman at work and cannot praise her enough. He wants his W to change her hair color or dress like a particular woman he knows. He talks about marriage as if it is his prison and his W is the warden. He makes unfunny jokes or comments about marriage, wives, playing around on the W, etc. He talks and behaves as if other women is the only topic that is ever on his mind.
* The H lacks male dominance. (The following was taken from another source). He lacks the take-charge ingredient when it comes to the MR and family life. His role models have been the TV sitcom H's who are the laid back, hen-pecked, passive types. He mistakenly believes that the way to a happy marriage is to let his W be in charge of everything, resulting in her ruling the roost. TV shows portray marriages that have a domineering W, with a somewhat dim-witted H who just happily goes along with whatever his W wants. In real life, those ingredients do not produce a happy W. It produces a W who disrespects her passive H who lacks male dominance in their MR and in the family home.
* The H is constantly rude and inconsiderate of her (and others). He embarrasses her in front of others. He talks down to her or makes fun at her expense in front of her children, family, friends, and in public. His manners are terrible. He is too loud (talking, laughing, poking at others, drawing attention, etc.) in public or in a group setting. He gets drunk and acts out in front of others. He may cuss or use vulgar language toward her and/or others while in public or a small group.
* The H never admits he was wrong or takes responsibility for his mistakes. He blames others or the situation for his failures. He is arrogant. The H won't listen to her views or concerns. He doesn't respect the opinion of others. He thinks he is right and everyone else is wrong....regardless of what it is. When watching TV, he gets drawn into the program....making condensing or vulgar remarks, even in front of the children. His negativity is always present in his interaction with others. She worries that the children will pick up his bad habits.
* The H is a control freak. This goes beyond a healthy interest or concern. He wants to control every aspect of the W (what she does, where she goes, who she talks to, what she wears, when she can visit her parents, etc.).
* The H is emotionally insecure. He is jealous, suspicious, fears, worries, expects the worst case scenario, gets anxious, etc. He doubts himself as a man. He needs constant assurances from his W that everything is fine.
* The H lacks compassion, patience, tenderness, and understanding. He resents his W's complaints or her attempts to discuss the need for him to have these traits. Instead of trying, he grows colder, harder and more impatient with her and the children.
* The H is selfish in every area of his life. Self-gratification is priority for him, and if his W and kids don't understand, that's too bad.
He wants her undivided attention on his needs. He drains her b/c he is always focused on himself and how he feels.
M:51 W:46 T:22 M:16 S:15 D:11
“Don't chase people. Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard. The right people - the ones who really belong in your life - will come to you and stay.”- Will Smith