I don't mind. I was really hoping that this thread takes off one day.
Today, I'm being hit with images.
I also keep getting this feeling of going home and just ending this whole thing. I want to move on. I made my mistakes and she made hers. She is a good woman, but sometimes I feel like the damage is too much. I hope these feelings flee.
I take it one day at a time.
I went through the same thing a couple of weeks ago. It is almost as if once we start to get what we want, we start to questing whether we really want it or not. From what I was told, that is normal. That once it feels like you are in R, or moving toward R, you will question if that is right. I think we get so into "winning" (winning as in not losing our Ws) that we never stop to ask if winning really means that.
I also have the problem that this is our second go around. The first time she had an EA was in 2005. That one was actually much worse emotionally, even though she immediately said she wanted to stay in the MR and fix it. This time was different in that she was saying she wanted a D right away.
But sometimes I wonder, am I just setting myself up for this happening again in the future? I mean, it was 12 years between these, in 5-12 years will we be back to this place again?
M(51), W(52),D(16) M-20, T-23 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018