Attaining MEH

[25yearsmlc]

I had mixed feelings about it, but - not once did I think your h did not deserve this. God no. (And I did snort when I read it and might have whispered a quiet "Bravo!")

Anyhow, I'd be shocked if this well deserved metaphorical slap comes up in any court hearing, and if it did, imo it would not reflect poorly on her.

And it won't come up in mediation as it is not the job of a mediator to determine fault, just divide assets.

I'm usually all about not fueling the WASs rage/negative images of the LBS that are used to justify affairs or leaving. I'm very pro reconciliation when it's right. So I get wounded's point.

In THIS situation, however, T's h has already effectively left, announced to her that he is "DONE" ( about 4067 times) and he is actively AND Publicly pursuing other women, ( )


That is some serious boundary crossing and it's so IN her face, I feel as if it's too much to ask of anyone to turn the other cheek, again.

T's H wants to have AND eat huge slices of cake, (which is not helping him as a man, in the long term). Some of his boldest cake eating is when he thinks he is still "friends" with T's family (??)

H tells people HE "tried to work it out, but T is so - um, so um, uh, -sooooo untrusting!(??)

"AND she's suspicious - For NO REASON!!"

(If a stranger told me their clothes and crap was found in their car, along with a photo of them and AP attached, it would not even cross my mind that the LBS had behaved inappropriately. I would know immediately that the WAS deserved it -and this is so obvious to me, that I doubt her H will rage about it. At least not accurately)

He may lie or rage but that's on him.

Here are my person favorite suggestions for T's hubby's script (i.e. what he might say, which are all predictable and cliched):


"Me w/ OW?? NO I didn't. You're so paranoid/ it was an accident/ happened AFTER I said I wasn't happy/ didn't mean anything/ Stop distrusting me/ YOU MADE ME!"


his impression management as "Dad of the Year" at soccer -all while ignoring the same kids at home - letting T wake up 4 times a night AND work AND study AND raise the boys solo, again...while he goes out to, you know, FIND HIS happiness...and blame her for not making that happen...

This man is not concerned about doing the right thing; he's concerned about looking as if he is doing the right thing.

all in all, I thnk T has been remarkably restrained.

Remember, her stated goal now is Not saving the m - it's about saving her boys and herself.


((( )))