It's been forever since I've been here and posted. I found out that Jack/Jeff had passed away several days ago and that this thread would be started on the boards. I've waited to post because I didn't know what to say.
Everyone who has already posted has said so many of the things that I also think about him.
I was lucky that I got to know him a bit off of the boards. I can't say that I was a good friend, but we did become friends. In recent years, he and I argued about politics among other things. Friendly banter though. His thoughts on politics were just as intelligent an thought out as they were here about marriages torn apart.
Of course, as everyone has said, he was tremendously helpful to me when I was going through my 'situation'. I was sad and distraught... Just like we all are when we come here.
Jack/Jeff had a way of being tough, but also understanding of the pain that we were going through. He had been through it himself of course.
I read through his old posts from when he was going through his sh!t. One reason that I connected with him as much as anyone here, was because what he went through was very, VERY, similar to what I was going through at the time. Funny enough, my situation ended up very similar to his too.
At one point, he and I started emailing off of the boards. It meant SO much to me that here was someone who didn't know me at all. Lived hundreds of miles away from me. Yet, took his time to read my thoughts, basically my personal journal, and tell me things that helped guide me.
He didn't tell me what I needed to do. He didn't say 'you're wrong' or 'you're right'. He had a way of saying things that caused me to think for myself. To figure out my path.
He also offered to speak with me on the phone. While I didn't want to take advantage of this too much, I did take him up on it. He was the same. He listened. He offered words. He shared his experiences. He talked about his new life. He made me feel better.
I did not get to meet him. We talked about having a beer when he was back in Colorado one day. Unfortunately for me, he never did make it back.
For everything that he did here, and that was A LOT, what I will remember is that he was genuinely a good guy. More of us could stand to live our lives caring about others the way that Jack3beans... Jeff... did.
I'm forever grateful. In this life and beyond.
Thank you man...
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce